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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Sex life during pregnancy

2 replies

bella1426 · 03/06/2018 09:19

Hi all, need some advice please! I'm in a 4 year relationship with a man I love very much and were having a baby in October. Our sex life has always been good (hotter and more adventurous at the start of course but who's isnt) it's calmed down a little in recent years and were down to pretty much once a week. Not a problem in itself but I'm starting to resent slightly that it's always me that makes the first move. He's a very willing participant once I do but I feel like there's a little bit of laziness or complacency there and if the opportunity to watch tv or look at crap on his phone is there that would be the preference 🙄

I wonder if we would ever have sex if o didn't instigate it and it is making me feel not that desired.
On my side I am pretty exhausted at bed time and in no mood for anything but I do make the effort to instigate things in the evening after I've put my son to bed (I have a 6 year old) or during the weekend when we have a cheeky hour to ourselves in the afternoon. The sex itself has gotten a bit routine, same moves to get to the end goal. I'm not feeling that attractive with the pregnancy weight so admittedly not feeling confident enough to pull many sexy moves (this combined with the fact he doesn't instigate is having an effect on my confidence)
So my question is this.. do I bring it up and if so how? Neither of us are great talkers and haven't really had any major issues or problems that have required it. It's so flipping awkward! I worry that denting the fragile male ego could do more harm than good and half thinking once I have my body and confidence back that may go a good way to solving the problem? Any advice appreciated!!

OP posts:
Butterflykissess · 03/06/2018 12:43

I couldn't deal with that. Making the move all the time would make me feel really undesirable.

bella1426 · 03/06/2018 13:46

Yeah it's shit. It's kind of always been the way though, I have a higher libido and he has a lot more interest in tv than I do! How to broach it though???

OP posts:
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