He left

[Rachalyssa]

My other half left me it's a long and shitty story he started a uni course in Sept while I was preg with our second baby baby wasn't planned but her 2 year old sister was . Anyway he started going out drinking and lying about who he was with me being paranoid thought he was seeing someone I went a bit nuts and called it a day btw this was going on an off for months I ended it feb time . Weirdly things kinda carried on and he was with me when baby was born in March he even stayed in hospital with me and at mine for 4 weeks after. He kept saying he drilled loved me but we didn't work but we still text and saw each other every day. A few weeks ago we went on holiday and we were all cuddly sleeping together and acting happy then when we got home he blew up said I knew u were holding onto false hope we r over we didn't talk for a week and I have in and started talking he says he's depressed and right now all he wants to do is get drunk and go out. I don't know what to do he's not the man i met the man i met wouldn't do this he would do anything for his kids and now he just isn't I'm heart broken I can't sleep or eat I didn't expect this at all our baby is only 11 weeks I thought u fight for what u want and he hasn't done one thing to try sort this I'm.lost

I'm so sorry to hear this :-( must be so tough with such a young baby. It sounds long-term like you'll be better off without him sadly :-( I'm so sorry it's so hard because you still love him but you're worth more than this. Your kids need a mummy who is loved not one who is taken for granted and disrespected.

If it's any consolation he sounds like a totally immature dick. And that's not to give him the excuse of becoming more mature over time. If he is like this is how he will continue forever.

He sounds like a manipulator too tbh, him blowing up at you after the holiday is as though he blames YOU for having a nice time and sleeping with him etc, like you were trying to lure him back, well actually that is not further from the truth because he is an adult who can make his own decisions.

My advice would be put up strong and firm boundaries , stop texting unless it is for child contact only.
Stay firm.
Stick to your boundaries.
Get your friends and family to help you with baby things and for distraction and emotional support.

He sounds like the kind of person who would keep leading you on and yet stay i responsible and inconsistent with you. It is so important that you stay firm and stay true to your decision no relationship, no friendship (at least for a year)
And work out a child contact arrangement.

Bless you it's hard but will get easier and you will one day be able to look back and know you are so much better off without him and made the right decision :)

I think there is likely someone else, and he likely does feel confused about whether he wants to be with you. However he is also being really emotionally abusive to you at a very vulnerable time in your life. Protect yourself from this treatment by drawing some clear co-parenting boundaries and moving on. Do not let him call the shots.

My friends have said he is being emotionally abusive as well. He swears there isn't anyone else and said he isn't in the right place for any relationship right now like really u decide this now he isn't the same person I met he is acting so diff even his step daughter can't believe it is him

There is almost always someone else when a man leaves his partner and kids. Unfortunate but true. He is being emotionally abusive and you are not to blame for his indecisiveness. As pp said stop all contact other than about dc, keep everything minimal don't give him the satisfaction of thinking you are sitting around waiting for him to make up his mind whether to choose you! You choose to move on and make a new life for yourself and you DC's as shit as it is he's a prick who has bailed on you.