Worried about friend

[narkedwithanarc]

My friend was in a 2 year relationship until recently. It hadn't been going anywhere for a couple of months because of differences in life views, fair enough.

However, there's a guy she knows who was very keenly interested in her for a while, even whilst she was in the relationship and made it well known. She was clearly flattered by his attention but ultimately decided she didn't fancy him.

And yet, she is now in a relationship with him immediately after splitting with her now ex. They haven't been together for more than a month and she's already said that she loves him, wouldn't mind getting pregnant right now, wants to marry him etc etc. This is a woman who is very career driven and has always said she wanted to be settled in her career before considering children etc. She's also quite young yet, the guy even younger.

This guy is very besotted with her and I'm worried that he's unintentionally love bombing her as he's not had a relationship for some time and she's getting swept away with it. He's making all the right noises she wanted from her ex.

I'm not sure there's anything I can really do to help her, but I needed to vent my concerns somewhere

When you are in a relationship you don't notice people in the same way. Maybe she does fancy him now. Or maybe she didn't want to admit she did before.

Does seem soon to be in love and have a baby. If it comes up suggest she enjoys the dating stage.

Is she being serious about pregnancy or just using that as demonstration of how sure she is rather than any actual intention of it happening just now.

I think you can and should voice your concerns to her. She might brush them off but think about it later. Or she might not listen.

Maybe also get her talking about the things she was interested in before - like her career. Sounds like she's got all her focus on this rebound new man, and moving her focus might help a bit.

She's serious about the pregnancy! Apparently he has said he'd be happy if she were to get pregnant and he'd love to be a Dad and she said she'd be happy if she was pregnant too...it just strikes me as totally odd and out of character.

She mentioned that he's very childlike and immature and it would be like having 2 kids "I think that would be fun" she says! At that point I did relate to my own past experiences and suggest that it's best just to have 1 child when you're both settled and ready

Definitely reeks of rebound to me too.

I think fancying someone who you compare to a child is more than a little worrying...

Two kids - where one has got past the age of growing up. Good grief. Who are they? Wendy and Peter Pan?

I mean I'm glad she's happy but it is all rather worrying, isn't it?

I've been with my new partner for almost 3 months myself, that's still early days. She claims we're being 'soooo slow' as we've not said we love each other yet. this just isn't her.