am i missing somehting baout he " shcool gate" myth

[CODalmighty]

or is outs chool just really nice/
aso we wait int he playdgorund so theres no huddlign really

explain yourslef codo

no nastiness
no cliques ( that i am aware of) poepel jus seem tpo mingle or stand a loen

I'm looking forward to the school gates.

There are some sour-faced baggages at preschool, it has to be said, but most are friendly.

I wonder if the sour-faced ones bleat that nobody talks to them?

Do you mean the cliques? OUrs had some at the beginning of reception, but they're non-existent now - we just talk to whoever!

REad the Playground Mafia - really funny!

that omg its relay tough and veeyrone i sa cow adn there is this group of alphaamums
go i talk to a different person evry time i think

We have the "known each other since ante-natal" Mums, all nice enough but stay in their group - kids all best friends etc. Then we have the much younger parents (early 20s). Then we have the old parents (me and a couple others who have passed 40). So I guess they aren't really cliques - just very distinct groups and there's very little cross-over between groups.

I've only ever heard one mum complain about being "left out" on our playground...and she was, erm, a bit standoffish - not helped by the fact that her child came late to the school and mid-term.

I've seen the odd run-in (one spectacular between two mothers who wouldn't believe their darling child could be at fault, where in truth, both were little sods).

I just go on to the playground and talk to whoever is there.

Or else DH goes, and everyone talks to him anyway, lol.

You are obviously an alpha mum cod so you haven't noticed

i htink its only chioppy folk who go on and on about it
REALLY GROW UP

I speak to all the mums @ the school gate

Or if I don't know their names I just nod and smile.

No cliques as far as I see

I think a lot of those things are in the eye of the beholder IYSWIM

I chat to anyone or no-one depending on who is there, standing alone or whatever. I don't see our playground as a clique although another Mum did say it was a bit like that the other day.

Maybve I just don't care enough about it!

Some school gates are a bit quichey ime.

The ones I pick up from now are fine.
State school: huge cross section of parents in terms of age/sex/wealth/no. of kids, also a fair few nannies/au pair/childminders/grannies, everyone chats away.

Private school: mostly 30 something mums, a few dads/nannies, with the oddd granny and childminder, everyone really friendly, no huddled groups glaring evilly about the place.

I was the only nanny picking up from a playgroup once, and NONE of the mums would speak to me, they used to phone and make playdates with my employer, and thought I was a forelock-tugging dimwit. None of this stopped them dumping their kids on me when it suited, obv.

Can't say I gave a shit, though.

Message withdrawn

the ones who stand alone thing your all in a quiche and stuck up yer own arses - they come on mumsnet and talk about you being bitches.

LDC

I hope you are not talking about your SIL.

well I don't have a problem with the whole school gate thing ,was talking woth another mum and she was moaning about other parents saying they were so rude because they didn't speak to her, but in reality she didn't speak to them either and you do have to take into account that some (a lot of )people are very shy about making the first move in conversation.People jump to conclusions and assume everyone is rude when they are just too bloody shy.

isn't a quiche some kind of egg-based tart?

I agree. Obviously friendships are forged and some people are closer than others, but there is no deliberate excluding or any of that nonsense. WEnt to PTA meeting where lots of people were agonising about why people didn't come and were they excluding or elitist and I said that lots of people couldn't be bothered, which was fine and up to them, but instead of saying 'I can't be arsed' it makes them happier to say, 'oh it's so cliquey, and there is nothing you can do about that.

indeed it is nally - how astute of you

i like quiche mmmmm