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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I approaching this the wrong way?

6 replies

Bettie1 · 28/05/2018 13:15

Hi there, my name is Bettie and I'm 29 years old. I've been seeing my boyfriend for a year now but he recently revealed something to me which I'm somewhat concerned about.

He is also 29 years old and plays in a band who are somewhat successful in our city. I had been speaking to some friends about a girl who had suffered from some mental health issues in the past most of which were caused by her teacher, who was in his late 50s, taking advantage of her when she was just 14 years old. A few years after this she accused a close friend of my other friends of rape only to later on admit she was lying about the whole thing. She is a very troubled and vulnerable young woman and suffers from self harm and severe depression. I was surprised to learn that my boyfriend had been sleeping with her when she was 18 years old and he is 10 years her senior. I mean obviously an age gap can be fine in some circumstances but in this one I dont feel it was. She was very into his band and very obsessive with him and he admitted that he took advantage of her vulnerability in order to sleep with her. I'm not a jealous person so thats not what brought me here. I have volunteered in helping young vulnerable people and I think what he did was very wrong and I cant help but view my boyfriend in a different light now. Is this wrong of me?

Thanks

OP posts:
userofthiswebsite · 28/05/2018 13:17

Yes, that would make me feel uncomfortable knowing that....

category12 · 28/05/2018 13:18

No, I'd find it hard to stomach that he knowingly took advantage of someone who he knew was vulnerable.

Fluffypinkpyjamas · 28/05/2018 13:23

He’s a creep. LTB

AndTheBandPlayedOn · 28/05/2018 20:05

You are not wrong. Always listen to your gut feeling.

TERFragetteCity · 28/05/2018 20:07

So this was only last year?

If he targets vulnerable people, what has he seen in you?

You need to ditch this man fast.

LemonSqueezy0 · 28/05/2018 20:28

Christ, he sounds sinister. I'd bin him off tbh.

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