Emotional abuse

[SBergeron]

Sometimes I think that I’m the crazy one, that it’s all my fault, because somehow I started it. “What now” would be the perfect title for my relationship with this man. Either I’m not giving enough attention, enough compliments going his way or I’m not understanding his feelings. Any morning that I don’t have someplace to be early, I’m expected to stay in bed, watch the news and have sex. Most of the time it’s my job to initiate the sex. If I get up before him, he’s pissed off! So I find myself going along with the cherade so that I don’t start my day with a fight. I’m burnt out!!

End it. I spent 15 years like this. 8 months down the line, I am so glad I left.

I remember lying in bed for hours waiting for my ex to wake up, so we could have sex and I wouldn't have to deal with his mood all day. Which is what would have happened if I got up when i wanted to.

A couple of years before I left, i started saying i couldnt sleep and would get up at 4am. And then just dealt with the aftermath. I couldnt ever just sleep in. Its not worth it. Being coerced into sex, is not ok. Having to have sex, because you are afraid of the consquences is not ok. Tbis is not something a partner should be doing to you.

There is masses of information online about emotional abuse. If you are struggling to leave or he won't let you, or even if you're not yet ready, it's a good thing to give Womens' Aid a call.

It may also be worth taking a look at Rape Crisis website.

Abusive relationships are often complicated which is what abusers want, and often need specific help to escape from. There is help out there. It took me years to come to terms with the hideousness of my own situation. Much easier to see it in others than what's under your nose!

Please don't lower yourself anymore.
Have a chat with Womens Aid and see what they have to say about all of this.
What are the living arrangements?
Please get him out of your life and fast.
This is knocking your self-esteem more and more everyday.
When you speak to WA, see if they have specialist counsellors in your area.
You need to work on yourself. Understand why you put up with this awful treatment.

But please, get away now!!!