Feel lonely

[Mistyblue120]

Feeling quite sad and lonely and also bored of my life. Was in a long term relationship and it's ended although I'm still good friends with my ex and we hang out all the time mainly because I have nothing else to do. Not sure really what to do from here

Hello it’s a bit late and i’m about to go to sleep however I wanted to say a quick hello! I can appreciate how you are feeling and have a lot of empathy; I feel a bit the same although in a different situation- Feel free to pm me 💐💐😊

What's your set up?
Do you have DC's. A job, how old are you and do you live in a town and do you have hobbies and other friends?
Sorry for the string of questions.
Background is needed though.
Loneliness is hard.

I’m lovely too. I split with my ex at the end of March. He won’t speak to me or see me anymore. My friends always hide from me when I’m heartbroken. I guess I must be difficult.

Sorry to hear that Dimael.

I don't have DCs which is a relief for me as a few years ago I considered having them with him. I'm 31.

I do have a job but I'm a freelancer. I'm just coming to the end of a 3 month project and I think that's also making me a bit sad as it kept me occupied and now life will go back to being even more lonely. I live in London so shouldn't be stuck for things to do but I always am. I do have some friends and they're good friends but I guess I don't always enjoy hanging out with them as it feels like hard work.

I think I'm just feeling very bored and unsatisfied at the moment. No purpose. It's easy to hang out with my ex partner who was my best friend but at the same time I can feel that the relationship has well and truly ended and and it's more out of habit and I think it's brought home how lonely I feel. I'm just not really sure what to do about any of it.

How about maybe puck up a new hobby or starting to volunteer?

What new hobby could I do?

What kind of hobby would you like to do?
It depends on what you like, maybe a sport, painting, taking fotos, baking, re-enactment. There is so much. Some hobbies such as re-enactment also come with a community.

Oh, and how about animals, do you like animals?

Why does it feel like hard work for you hanging out with your friends?

I think I feel a bit like I've grown apart from them and don't have much in common. I've known them from school and we all get along but I'm quite different to them especially now.

The hobbies I've done in the past I've never made friends from or they've been quite solitary.

I just seem to have this core of sadness within me. I am hoping to possibly move out into my own place this summer. ( I currently live in a flat share) and I'm thinking of getting a dog which might help

We have dogs, they are so much fun. How about a hobby where you could meet other people, likeminded people. Can you think of anything less solitary you would enjoy? A sport, a choir.

There are hobbies which are quite solitary and they are hobbies where people are like a tribe. What do you enjoy doing?

Three sociable hobbies that are a good laugh are:

Lindy Hop - there are dance classes, swing festivals, social dances all over the country and it's a really good way of smiling, laughing and meeting people. Pretty even split of men/women.

Community Choir - Again, loads of them all over the place. Usually no audition or requirement to read music. They do vary in the musical expertise/interests of the leaders and that is reflected in the repertoire and 'mission statement' of the choir but good for a laugh. Often more women and men tend to be older.

Ukulele - you can get one on Amazon for £25 and teach yourself 3 or 4 chords very quickly. Join a ukulele group and pick it up as you go. Again, very sociable and varied. I got to 3 - I do travel a bit to get to them. One is full of old men (65+) and very traditional; one is an even mix of men women in 40s and 50s playing mainly punk; another is a younger group (30s/40s) who play more modern stuff. I've been in them for a while now and it's great. We chat, drink beer, play music, gig... what's not to enjoy!