Friend seems like she has vanished into thin air!

[littleneepo]

I reconnected with a old primary school friend about 2 years ago, we discovered that our sons are almost the exact same age - and we ended up meeting up about once per week for playdates & gossip over the past year.
About 2 months ago she had her second baby, a girl, delivered by c-section. She sent me a couple of messages in the day or two afterwards letting me know about the birth but then went completely quiet... almost like she was vanished!
I keep sending her a message (about one a week) - suggesting we catch up soon, or asking how she & baby is, or asking another relevant question, but I've got nothing back! I bought some cute clothes as a present for her new baby girl and posted them to her about a month ago... again heard nothing.
Not really sure what to do! I know she'll probably be majorly busy due to a 4 year old and a baby but not even to reply to one message?
I see my options as:

1. just leave the relationship until she wants to get in touch - I feel stupid just keep messaging an empty void! or 2) to try and contact her mum or husband to find out if she's ok.

I don't know any of her other friends to ask - we've only really ever met up specifically to see each other rather than as a group.

I don't want to seem clingy or annoying to her... but I must admit it has upset me quite a bit as I thought we were good friends (but maybe I was wrong!). Help! :)

Do you know she is ok? Eg has she updated social media etc. I would stop texting her so frequently about meet ups and perhaps offer help? Maybe she’s feeling overwhelmed? But a note to her DH saying you’re concerned would be fine. But not pushing to meet up.

I know lots of people would say to leave her but I'd be worried she'd got pnd or something had happened to the baby.
I'd speak to her mom if I could saying I know she's probably just very busy but worried how she is and here if she needs me.

I'd go for option 2. Just to make sure she's okay then I'd leave it.

hi fiorentina - no I don't know if she's ok... she hasn't updated social media other than the initial "we've had a baby" post... although she has never really used social media user so that's not strange. As we don't have any other mutual friends I don't have any other way of knowing if she's ok.
Sorry if my post wasn't clear - I'm not messaging her every week asking about a meet up (I know that would be pressurising her!)... I think I've suggested a meet up twice, but the other messages are things like asking a question about how she's doing, or offering help (like you suggested), or sending a pic with something I've seen that is funny or her son might like... you know, the kind of message a friend would send! :)

Id be worried if my friend disappeared and no contact. Could you pop over?

hi delilabell - that's exactly what I'm worried about - I had PND after my son and funny messages from friends often cheered me up a little bit or provided distraction. Also you're right what if something has happened to her daughter? I guess it's not my right to know but I'd like to offer my support if something has happened.

Have you tried to phone her rather than sending messages??
Or try using Facebook messenger - it shows you when she was last active online and also if you send her a message on there it will show you when she’s read it

hi jaxinthebox - I've got a few baby bits that she lent to me so I thought that would give me a reason to pop over to drop them back (much too big to post - one of them is a jumperoo!), and I could just check she's ok at the same time. However I'm worried I'll seem like some crazy stalker woman just turning up at her door!!

hi wildlingofthewest...
nope haven't tried to phone her... don't think I've ever called her (a bit weird now I think about it!). That's a good idea actually.
The messages are via whatsapp so I can see they've been delivered and have been read. Maybe she lost her phone tho... could try a message on FB thanks!

Have you driven past at all to see if cars are there? Or any sign of people at home.
Or a strategic walk with the kids around school pick up time. Not to confront her, just to see if she’s ok from a distance.
Also fb messenger tells you when she was last online if you send a message on there?