Turning 30 and no one to celebrate with

[mocktales]

Friends that is.

I have dh, my daughters and my parents but I don't have any friends. I have acquaintances from school drop offs and mums who I do play dates with but not friends. I have some nice work colleagues but I've never seen them out of work. I'm new and friendships are formed and cliquey.

I'm 30 next month. I'd love a party but how sad that I have no one to ask. I don't drink and I lack confidence and have awful anxiety but I'm kind, generous and I can be fun.

Pointless post really. I just would love a friend. Someone to text other than my husband and my mum. Someone to go for coffee with.

Im so sorry you feel like this anxiety is awful
Could you maybe have a family break for your birthday? That would give you something to look forward to
Sorry i cant be more help op i feel for you

I've never dared have a party as I don't think anyone would come :( im in the south east

I’m in a similar boat. Whereabouts are you?

I just turned 30 and am in a similar situation and have moved recently too, whereabouts do you live, OP

I'm in Surrey. Sorry to hear others are in similar boats. It's a lonely place

I'm in a similar situation except I'm about to turn 50 (which must sound really old to you 30s!) I'd love to have a birthday party but wouldn't have anyone to invite. It makes me very sad as I don't think that I'm likely to make new friendships now at this age as I work FT and it's all consuming. I anticipate becoming a lonely old lady :-( You are not alone OP

You are not alone op

Can you not just have a low key party and ask your work colleagues and the school mums? People I'm sure would love to come?

That's a nice idea but it would be a complete hash of people, seemingly to have numbers there iykwim. I really don't know anyone well enough to ask or expect them to come out for my birthday.

Nc for this. I was in a similar boat then and probably will be for my 50th too.

But I wonder if there's old friends you could meet up with? I was alone where I lived because I'd moved away from home town.

So for my 30th I went back! Had a fantastic night out with my old friends from college etc.

Is that a possibility?

If not do something you've always wanted to that doesn't need to involve anyone else.

For my 50th I'm planning a trip of a lifetime to somewhere I've long wanted to visit but isn't a typical tourist destination so unlikely to get someone else wanting to go - I'm still going!

Doesn't need to be a trip can be a marathon, bungee jump, make a record (even if you can't sing!), a one day course in eg art or circus skills.

How does that sound?

My 30th was awful. Back then I was single with no children and the only one who remembered my birthday was my mum. She popped in to visit for an hour with a bottle of wine, which I drank alone while sobbing. OP, arrange a nice family dinner and celebrate with the people who love you.

I’d love to have a party with lots of friends, but have only had two in the last 20 years, and neither were great.

21 - went back to my mother‘s for the weekend, she insisted on my having a party. Problem was, all my friends were at university so it was a houseful of her friend’s. Ok, so I did know them, but it’s not the same as being surrounded by your own friends.

25 - was living in halls, so invited people in my block. But I was close to very few of them, so it didn’t really feel like “my” party. One lass persuaded my DP to have a fag (I HATE smoking, which he knew)so I ended up leaving at that point (to be fair it was late and most others had long gone).

I don’t do parties, just dinners out with DP for my birthday.

I said party in my op but I just meant dinner or something with a few friends. Only I don't have any.

The best birthday I ever had just involved DH, our 2 kids, my MIL, FIL, my sister and my best friend. Quality over quantity

Most of my social life revolves round DH and family, but I do have a few friends, thank goodness! Mainly from school/college. It's a repeating theme though, posters on here often say they've no friends. So how do you make friends then? What's the secret?

But why can't you just invite the people you know? I don't live where I grew up and for certain reasons don't have a 'mum crew' or a large group who know each other. I have a few work friends, a few from home, one from uni etc. If five or six (inc partners) of the ones you know would come, you've got a little party! One of the things about getting older is that you meet fewer people, so it may be weird to start, but they have you in common, a few beers, everyone would chat. Keep it shortish, drinks at yours rather than hiring a pub and then if everyone kicks out for the babysitter at 11 it's fine.