So now what

[Minecraftsucks]

Name changed

I’ve been interested in a man for several months now, it’s a ldr kind of thing and with time constraints we don’t see each other very often. His job is crazily busy works 12 -14 hour days 5 days a week and occasional sundays. He also likes a drink and drinks to excess Friday and Saturday.
Only had one full weekend together the rest of the time it’s with mutual friends. I want to move things forward but the situation can’t change with distance,my children etc.
He’s got lots of female friends which I have no issue with. one of his friends does fancy him and tried to cause an issue by insinuating he’s intrested in her but it didn’t change anything I spoke to him he isn’t intrested in her.
Anyway last night he told me that he’s not that interested in sex I really do like him he’s become a massive part of my life but no sex I don’t know what to do.

I think you do know what to do. I cannot see one single reason why you would continue with this.

What would he bring to your life if you were in a relationship? Calmness and happiness, or chaos and celibacy?

You do know what to do.
He's not interested.
He's trying to tell you this but doing it badly.
Take the massive hint he's dropping and end it.
Find someone with a compatible sex drive and someone who actually wants to be with you.

Read your own post back to yourself, and think if this was a friend asking my advice what would i tell her,
he dosent live close to you, he woprks long hours, he drinks to excess on friday and saturday his day off , so where do you get any attention on that day, you cant move closer to him, not interested in sex, so basically hes a long distance friend, not a boyfriend, and your the one at home hanging on for crumbs from this guy, tell him its over and find yourself someone nearer home who will give you , time, attention, affection and make you feel special

And do actually get out there and try to find someone new, and don't just hanker away.

He could be a good guy, but from what you've said, and the distance and the fact that you are having to do all the running.....and his incompatible lifestyle....really? You'll just be hankering while he's out.

I can't see this going anywhere tbh.
It's interesting that you bring up his female friends that you don't have a problem with.
One of them fancied him but it was ok coz he wasn't interested.
Why bring it up if it's not a problem?
I think your gut is telling you something.

Workaholic, alcoholic, doesn’t want sex. Doesn’t sound like a catch to me. Drop him and find someone decent.

Listen very carefully op, he isn't interested in you. Just reading about him sounds exhausting, any relationship with him has car crash written all over it, just pity any poor sod that ends up with him.

What is it you really like about him?

I’m reading all the comments believe me. The comment “calmness and happiness or chaos and celibacy” actually made me cry.
As for what I like about him he makes me laugh, we talk about everything, he’s intrested in how I think about things, encourages me to improve myself. Says he loves me I do believe he does

He lives far away from you.

He works 5 days and nights a week and gets drunk all weekend so you hatdly ever see him alone.

Hes not interested in having sex with you.

You have made him a massive part of your life.

Can you see a problem with the above?

So I did it I told him we want different things and we should be friends although I have to admit I was hoping he’d make a huge declaration of love. I saw him over the weekend and he was crap so on Monday I told him I want time away and for him not to message me I know it’s early days but I feel better each day