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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Need your advice once more

12 replies

Kav123 · 26/04/2018 12:05

Hello all,
I need some advice badly. Sometimes when you are going through personal issue its hard to make decision or think straight. Friends would be bias, so I need advice from strangers, may be you can tell me something I am not taking into consideration.
My husband has decided to remove all my images from his Instagram and Facebook and removed me from his friend list. I only found out yesterday that he has removed me from all his social media. When I asked he says its no big deal and I am making fuss over nothing. He says I am paranoid, and irrational, but am I? I think he has his eye on someone on FB may be, so he is showing her that he is living a single life? He goes on holiday with me but checks in on places alone, no mention of me anywhere but with his friends its different story.
I had an argument yesterday over him removing me from all social media and he told me he loves me & only me, and I should not be acting like a teenager over FB etc. Am I really overreacting here ?
I don’t think he cares about me either, last Tuesday I vomited blood and had to leave work, not once he asked if I am ok when he got home or after that. If I made hospital appointment? did I see GP? What did they say NOTHING at all… may be he doesn’t think I am sick enough ..im really confused how to take it…

OP posts:
Storm4star · 26/04/2018 12:08

Removing all your images seems very odd to me and to get out of explaining he just says “no big deal” and then accuses you of acting like a teenager? You’re married, and he decides to wipe out your existence an all his social media? I wouldn’t be happy with this at all.

ElspethFlashman · 26/04/2018 12:12

That's really OTT. Eradicating you from his public persona.

But if he didn't ask after you when you were vomiting Blood, then it seems that it could be as simple as: he's just not that into you.

The words are easy to say, but look at his actions, not his words.

Dancingleopard · 26/04/2018 12:17

Yeah that’s really odd. Why is he erasing you from his public life? He should be proud to be with you.

I’d have a big issue with this and tbh what a dick for making you feel like you are over reacting and making a fuss over nothing Angry

Dancingleopard · 26/04/2018 12:19

Ooops missed the bit about you being sick.

Kav you deserve better. Start preparing for a break up

Kav123 · 26/04/2018 12:39

Thank you.. i am thinking of splitting up since he doesnt care and doesnt want me around, his actions says that loud.. I just wanted to know if its normal to do that, removing your partner from all social media ..

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 26/04/2018 13:08

Nope - the only time I remove images like that is if the partner is a recent EX partner!!!
He's removing you from his life.
I'd oblige by removing him from yours.
This is NOT normal behaviour and it's fuckin' disrespectful to you.
Tell him to fuck off and be with whoever he is trying to convince he is single.
You deserve so much better.
This guy is not the one for you.
What is the living situation?
Do you own your house together?

Shampaincharly · 26/04/2018 13:12

I am not on FB but I would think that removal of all trace of you is not nice, and definitely suspicious.
FYI my husband is not good at asking how I am...not sure if that is normal or not.

Kav123 · 26/04/2018 13:13

No we dont own house together.. I am really sad at the situation but i think for my own sake i should leave, even though i dont want to.. I am so disappointed at myself that i am such a bad judge of character ..I removed his pic yesterday from everything as well..

OP posts:
Kav123 · 26/04/2018 13:15

I was just thinking that i might be overreacting ..and that splitting up over this seem so weird.. i mean i have no proof he is up to something ..

OP posts:
whiteradiator · 26/04/2018 13:49

I think he is seeing someone else or trying to impress someone else. I would leave him but make sure you transfer all money from a joint account to your mums account or something and get far away before starting divorce proceedings. He's not right...

topsy2tails · 26/04/2018 13:56

So basically he appears to be single on SM?
Why do you suppose that is?

hellsbellsmelons · 26/04/2018 14:06

It's not weird to split up over it.
It's friggin' weird for him to do it.
You are married and supposed to be building a life together.
He is now dismantling that and trying to convince the world you don't exist.
Fuck that.
If you have no kids and no mortgage then now is time to bow out and let him get on with his own life as that is so clearly what he seems to want to do.
Without you in it!!

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