Nipped an emotional affair in the bud, struggling

[sevenatenine3]

Im struggling with sadness having told my male friend that we had to cease text contact. I am married and lonely and sad. My friendship had caused me to seek comfort, solace and emotional needs from my friend.I adore him. we have a great connection but was afraid it was becoming an attachment so i nipped it.I am so sad.He was shocked and did not expect that chat. weve had no contact over the weekend, bar a text from him to say that he feels like he is going through a break up. I dont think he ever viewed me in a romantic/sexual way. Im not sure.He said he was really upset but totally got where I was coming from. Wil this get any better?So lonely.

There is no issue with it becoming an attachment if it's on a friends only basis - I would say it's normal to be attached to your friends, otherwise you wouldn't make a very good one! Because you are lonely in your existing relationship, maybe it is making you see your friendship differently. Could you start up a hobby where you can meet other people?

Every time you miss or feel like contacting your friend. Do something with your DH instead.
Grass grows where it’s watered

I felt that I was getting closer and closer to him, more messaging, more confiding in eachother, I was spending my evenings in contact with him and him with me..late night/early morning texts. i need to find somewhere to get my emotional needs met because my husband is not interested or able to give me that in my marriage

God you poor thing.
This wouldn't have happened if things were OK with your husband, so I guess you have to make a choice now whether you want to work on your marriage or if it's time to think about moving on. Must be really hard.

If your marriage is not giving you what you need, is it an option to end it?

my husband is not interested or able to give me that in my marriage

Is it because you’ve been getting it elsewhere? Maybe he feels the same

Do you both make an effort with each other? What is it he doesnt do?

Men need a few pointers sometimes they dont always pick up on things. If you havent already discuss it with him and see what he says, if he refuses to see the problem and make an effort with you then thats an issue, but it could be that he’s currently oblivious to how lonely you feel.

You are getting this emotional connection from the wrong person, do you want that connection with your husband? If not, there is something seriously wrong that needs addressing.. Try to get it from your husband.