Emotionally labile: what can help?

[mugOfCoffee]

I am the very tired mother of an 18 month old who doesn't sleep. Have had about 1 hour's unbroken sleep per day since DS was born. DH has stepped up in many ways, does weekly shopping, most dinner cooking (while I do bedtime routine) lots of washing etc. Never fails to step up when asked to. I don't ask him to sort night wakings because DH works full time as an academic (80-100 hours per week) and he is already exhausted and overworked. We have no family who can help.

Probably because of tiredness and hormones (periods returned a couple of months ago, mood seems to swing in a way I find very hard to not really control), I find myself being a snappy bitch to DH too often, getting irritated or incandescently angry over things that really don't matter.

I have been depressed in the past. I don't think I am now: I just can't control irritation and anger that manifest in response to DH sometimes being mildly irritating in ways that are really inoffensive.

Can anyone suggest how I can control the anger? I am fine most of the time but sometimes (eg PMT) it takes hold in a way I can't really control. It is obviously undesirable all round, teaching DS bad habits, turning DH away, destructive to everyone including me.

I should also say that the anger is just at DH. I don't feel anger toward DS or others. And a lotof the time I do actively control the impulse to be irritated, it's just thatsometimes Ican't.

Basically I need more sleep, but in default of that I need techniques and possibly drugs to manage my begaviour.

For your sanity DH needs to take a week parental leave and help you at night. Failing this on the weekend you should get a long lie in or an afternoon nap every day.

With the night wakings are you breastfeeding? Is DS teething? Are you co-sleeping? You need help and fast, how you have survived so long on so little sleep I don't know and this is coming from someone who had a child waking every 2 hours until they were 2 years old.

With regard to evenings after bedtime is there a reason why DH couldn't go into ds until he goes to bed while you go to bed early. You might bank a 4 hour stretch that way to help you in the short term.

Can you nap in the day when ds naps?