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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Stalking

3 replies

toddn72 · 17/04/2018 23:45

I am just after some advice. I have been seeing a lovely woman for a month now and we live over a hundred miles away from each other. She is great and when we are together we have such a nice time. She was in a relationship up until a year ago. That ended as he was always suspicious and following her, a cussing her of having affairs, going through her phone etc. She had to get the police o cw before and he had stopped it all after that. He has appeared on the scene again and he has been turning up at random places where she goes. She maintains that he is not dangerous but unwell. She has been a bit mixed with me at times and I totally understand why she is stressed. She is a string and independent woman and I doubt she would appreciate me directly intervening or giving her advice. However I really do like her and I would hate to lose a relationship with her because of the actions of her ex. I am a very trusting and supportive guy but I do find it a bit frustrating.... What should I do?

OP posts:
Ariela · 18/04/2018 00:15

Advise her to report him for stalking, the laws have changed a few years ago and it is easier to do something about a stalker.

Scornedwoman67 · 18/04/2018 00:25

I would make sure you know the whole story before assuming he is stalking her. You say she has been a bit 'mixed' with you & that this chap has recently appeared again? I'd be slightly suspicious. Then again I'm a cynic who has been messed about more times than I'd care to mention.

Changedname3456 · 18/04/2018 08:20

Why are you seeing someone who lives so far away from you? Seriously - life is way too short for all the travelling.

Are you going to move away from your friends and social life if you start to develop the relationship? Is she?

Add in crazy stalker ex and I don’t see any positives for you here.

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