If someone sent your husband this

[Alfl1980]

The someone being a woman he works with, and you saw he replied "the boy knows what he wants" or something similar. What would you think? Asking in case am overreacting here. We haven't been getting on at all but wouldn't expect him to speak about our relationship to a female colleague he says he doesn't see that often. I saw the message and reply and feel actually yes is must be about us. He said no not at all, has no idea why she sent that and his reply was in reference to the boy in the picture.

Can you please help me out this in perspective.

It’s not a joke, it’s not even funny, it’s just odd.

There must have been some context, because if a woman just sent him that out of the blue then she’s seriously weird, it doesn’t really warrant any response.

Thank you all for perspectives.

Annie - I asked for people's opinions here as was unsure if had blown out of proportion. It was his response t me as much as anything that caused suspicion. But comments noted - thank you.

It doesn't make any kind of sense. It doesn't even make sense in the context of 'he's been talking about our relationship' since it's implying the husband does want the wife there at night.

I'm surprised he didn't bin it, but maybe he was embarrassed for how fucking stupid it makes her look?

If he’s had a moan in the office, after work drinks, to a mate and she overheard, then he may well have learned his lesson. Maybe she heard something and ran with it and his “ the boy...” response was his way of saying “not me”.

That’s all I got in terms of it being not really weird or suspicious.

Can he explain why she sent it to him in the first place, was it a mistake?

I'd think their relationship was inappropriate, or at least heading that way. They are laughing together about a joke which isn't funny and the only point of which is to disrespect the wife. It's creating a them against you kind of attitude. I'd be wondering if the marriage problems are there because of the inappropriate relationship or is it the other way round?

Do you know much about the colleague OP? I only ask because I had a colleague who was a bit of an oddball & he spent a lot of time spamming us all in the office with pretty shit memes & jokes that he found on the internet. I wouldn't read too much into it tbh unless you have any other reasons to be suspicious about the context he's mentioned her in.

I'm usually more on the OP's side of not liking what the guy has done but I feel like he just gave a random reply that didn't mean anything, for once!

Basically the picture she sent is so random and silly/not funny/such a waste of time that she has shown herself to just be meh.

Is she trying to get something out of your DH? Well it didn't work, because it seems like he just gave a boring response.

He probably has noticed her attention seeking and isn't feeding it. So I'd not be unhappy with him.

However if you're not getting on lately then maybe he shouldn't waste his time replying to her waste of time images and talk to you instead. Sorted.

To me it's just a joke, I think you're reading too much into it.

I can see from the responses that lots find it odd, offensive even, but me and my husband post things like that all the time.
All sorts of jokes, some you can relate to, some you can't.
No subliminal messages or anything suspicious, just thought it was funny.

Of course, it MAY be relevant, he MAY have been discussing your marriage, but it's equally likely he hasn't and she just saw it and thought it funny and wanted to share!

I think, that if your having a hard time insecurities and jealousy and anger might be getting the better of you and making you read into things more deeply than you might have done if everything was great.

Also, ewedoewe there may not be any context at all..

I once read an article online about a cookery book featuring semen as the main ingredient, I thought it was hilarious and as my brother is a chef I sent him the link over Facebook.
100% no context, I thought it was funny and thought he might too.

Also tagged my DH in a post/joke about women farting during oral and rimming.
No context, I thought he would find it funny.

I would also assume be had spoken about your marriage.

I would be asking dh why was a colleague he claims not to see very often be texting him at all about anything except work. Why would she send a joke to him unless they are close in some way? Maybe she is out to hook him. I would be very watchful of dh.

The context in your scenario Snappy is that your brother is a chef and it was a cookery book/recipe.

If you’d have sent it to a random colleague that would be odd. I’m surprised you can’t see that.

If I thought the random colleague would find it funny I would though!
And would be quite offended and hurt if said colleague then thought I was odd or weird or whatever the word you used was as it would be nothing more than sharing a joke I thought they would enjoy.
No subliminal messages, no spouse stealing etc, entirely innocent.

Are there deeper issues in your relationship? I can't honestly say I'd give a shit if my husband got that and it would never occur to me it was about me. So what has made you immediately think it's about you? There must be some other issues in the relationship that's making you leap to that conclusion?

If it was a joke you thought they’d enjoy, then there would be some background or conversation (ie. context) between you that would have given you an indication they’d enjoy it or find it funny.

If you send random “funny” stuff to random people then you’re odd.

If you completely out of the blue sent me an article about a recipe book in which an ingredient was semen I’d think you were most strange and would probably avoid you in the canteen .

It wouldn't happen. If someone sent my DH this he would moan that they clearly didn't have enough work to do!