Does anyone still feel low after dealing with ex - when does it stop?

[Eesha]

Just a rant really. Ive recently split with my ex who has a drink and anger problem. Somehow i got him to go and i have tried to keep it amicable due to the children. However he tries to be calm but then it seems like he always seems to do something like snap at me which makes me feel bad and reminds me why we are not together. He always apologises and I know i should feel glad that we are not together but i feel really sad afterwards, like why cant he just realise his behaviour is hurtful. I dont want to antagonise him so i try to put on a brave face till he goes but inside i get so angry and upset at him.

I understand entirely. You are trying to move on but keep getting drawn back to how it used to be. My ex is the same. He also had anger issues and I’m trying to stay amicable but feel drained if we fall out. I think the key is to detach from it but I’m still trying to work out how myself. I constantly remind myself I’m better off for not being with him but I can’t quite get to the “ I couldn’t care less stage” you’re not on your own x

Thank you brokenhearts123, just knowing someone else has same situation makes me feel like I’m not mad or alone

It can be incredibly draining. Each person's worst and strongest traits tend to be exaggerated and heightened, and everything rubs up wrong. I remember a row over a hairbrush turning epic. Bring five minutes late took on a frenzied load of anger and frustration. It took a long time for me to learn to handle the small stuff; the big stuff still tips me over the edge. And it's all because there are children: if there weren't, I would never have had any dealings with him again. Boundaries are extremely difficult when you are trying to create a balance.