Hi all,
I've been feeling increasingly anxious about this issue, and I'd be very grateful for any advice that you may have.
My partner and I have been together for 10 years, we own our house together and we are both 28. Everything would be great, except that one one occasion, about 2 years ago, my partner said something along the lines of 'I don't think I want to have children'. Because we'd been together since we were both 18, it felt like we were too young to really discuss big things like having children, but at about 26, the issue had finally come up. At the time, I was pretty upset, because I know that I do want the family experience and it is what I would want in my life. I didn't want to end things with my partner at this conversation, because we were still only 26 and I figured we have plenty of time to discuss this again. Now, another 2 years later, I am wondering at what age should you assume that the other person won't change their mind?
Ideally, I would like to have 2 children, and I have thought that that would mean maybe starting to try for children at about 32, so thats in another 4 years. I just don't know what to do, it is impossible to know whether he would ever change his mind. I am worried that I'll wait until about 32 and find that he still doesn't want children, and then it may be harder to start all over again and find someone to settle down with. I am also worried that if I leave our relationship now and give myself time to find someone who is interested in the same life direction as me, that my partner would, over that time, decide that he would like to be a dad, although now he would be with someone else.
I feel really confused and stressed about this because I don't want to miss out on having children, and if I do leave and he changes his mind, the thought of him having children with someone else would be devastating, I'd think, if only I'd been more patient!
Any advice would be appreciated!!