DS talked about Ex's GF and smacking

[SparklyMagpie]

I actually wasn't sure where to post this and didn't fancy risking AIBU

I'm just really not sure the best way to go about this

So this morning I was sat on DS ( 2 and a half) bed and we were having a lovely morning chat and laughing

He then out of the blue mentioned Ex's GF and mentioned how she played with him and his train set (he's stayed at their house over the weekend) all well and good and it was lovely seeing him talking about it

Until he randomly starts saying her name and "SMACK" "X slap leg" "slap!" " it hurt"
So I asked him if she had hurt her leg and he just kept saying "slap""she say sorry" and then ended it with " she happy"

:( without putting anything into his head etc I couldn't really get much more info, if I asked him where he just kept saying leg.

Now he's little, and I know children can go through phases or maybe just get a little mixed up in what they are saying,but he's never said anything like this before, and if he has mentioned her it's always positive.

I have no issue with my ex's girlfriend, she's been with his dad since a few weeks before I gave birth to our son and we have met and I've had her round to celebrate DS's birthday and we've always, well what I think, have gotten along.

I just feel torn, I'm going to message ex but I don't want it To come across as me accusing them of anything? I'd also like to think if I had a partner and my DS said anything to his dad, his dad would contact me.

I just don't know how to word it,if I'm making any sense?

I've been debating whether to post since 6am and I just feel so sick in my stomach. I've not noticed any marks either. DS hasn't ever come out with anything like this before so I have no reason to doubt anything right now but I also trust his dad

How would you go about this?

Oh sorry I wasn't saying that with it being the first time, I don't think it would ever happen again or it wouldn't happen...I just mean it completely caught me off guard so early this morning

And they way I've worded the message wasn't coming off as passive aggressive at all, I shall tell him what was said when he replies as he'll want to know.

Oh Christ I'm not putting this across well am I 🙈 I've still not had my morning coffee

You've got me thinking now @GreenFingersWouldBeHandy whether I was passive aggressive in my message,but when I've read it over and had mentioned about DS randomly talking,I'm hoping it didn't

A couple of months ago I got a random message off his whilst he had DS saying " when and how did DS get that bruise on his leg?" I had absolutely no idea what he was going on about and as I smother cream onto DS for his eczema,there was definitely no bruise the night before...we ended up coming the conclusion that it may have been one that had happened whilst at his house or DS had mentioned on the way home from nursery a couple of days before ( after I filled out an accident sheet for a mark on his cheek that turned out to be nothing) that he had been running and banged his leg

Turns out when at the doctors as he was poorly with an ear infection I got the doctor to check over and she found a lump, which we have a hospital app at the end of the month to get checked out. Thankfully it seems to have disappeared now.

But it was a complete mystery bruise, I automatically felt i was being targeted a little from his message but once we talked we decided it may have happened at his house or nursery

Hence me getting a little anxious on how to word something like this to him. It's not a nice feeling to feel like you are being accused.

It will get sorted either way and most likely nothing but I thank you all for the advice and will update if needed :)

Time to go and make a reward chart with DS for potty training

My DD went to breakfast club aged 4 and told them I had hit her ‘hard across the face’!!! They pulled me into a room in the morning and told me what had happened, I was absolutely mortified and cried all the way home. It was completely untrue and I still to this day have absolutely no idea what possessed her to say it... Children are strange beings and do have wild imaginations. I would just mention it politely to your ex.

Thanks Pinkvoid :)

Ex messaged me back saying he hadnt a clue,but that they are both usually playing/mucking around so DS more than likely may have smacked her leg ...apparently she is just as much a kid than him
I like knowing he gets on so well with her and I've never doubted their relationship, so I think I shall forget about this now

Again thank you all for your replies, we're now in the process of finishing off our new chart which will include a big talk again about how we don't smack etc others as a reminder

I think your ds is lucky to have such loving adults in his life who all get along. I am glad you sorted out any worries

Thank you :) he's one happy, content little boy and we're very very proud !

Glad you're feeling reassured.

And it's great to hear about your attitude with the GF, very healthy and will indeed help him be a happy little boy.