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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Brother rubbish at getting together

4 replies

CurlyRover · 07/04/2018 12:16

I've been trying to meet up with my brother since I last saw him in October last year. Christmas we were due to meet up but I got my days wrong and the date we had planned was a day after DP, DSD and I were due to go away so I had to cancel a few days before. Ever since then I have tried rearranging on numerous occasions. I've suggested dates such as "I'll be free between the 2nd and 7th Jan all day every day. Are you free at all then?" He replies eventually and say yes. But when I try to nail down an exact date I get nothing back. I can't specify one date in the first place as when I've tried that in the past he's just said he's busy on that particular day. This has happened again over the Easter holidays and I can't help but feel disappointed.

He's never been to any of my houses since I moved out of our parents over 10 years ago, has always had to be at or near his house and everything has always had to be instigated by me. He doesn't work but is always too busy to even just reply let alone meet up. I get that you fill your day up regardless of your working hours but whether I try and plan something next week, next month or 3 months down the line it still seems too much for him.

Am I expecting too much or should I just give up?

OP posts:
PhonixK · 07/04/2018 12:52

I personally would give him the ball.

I would text something along the lines of "I've tried arranging to meet but you're always too busy, could you arrange a time that suits you?" That way the ball is in his court and you know you've done everything you can.

letsdolunch321 · 07/04/2018 12:58

I would take his lack of commitment as he isn’t interested.

Leave him to contact you

Mum4Fergus · 07/04/2018 13:16

Leave him be...you've tried your best Thanks

CurlyRover · 07/04/2018 20:53

PhonixK I've tried that. Quite often by "try to nail down an exact date" I mean I say something along the lines of "Great, let me know what time and date suits you" which is when I get nothing back

I should just give up shouldn't I? Sad

OP posts:
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