Should I get back in contact with my ex?

[Dimael]

My ex moved to another country and long distance hasn’t worked out. He split was fairly amicable or so I thought. Now my best friend who is married to me ex’s friend is giving me the silent treatment and today has told me she will go on holiday with her husband instead of me during the week we had booked a girls holiday. Something is badly wrong here. She is supporting my ex over our 10 year + friendship. I am heartbroken about losing him but I cannot make it work when I don’t speak the language or want to move my family. This was not because I don’t love him, I really do. And it isn’t because he did something wrong, he is a good man or so I believe.
I feel like he has said something to her or his friend that has turned them against me. I don’t know what to do. Either ask her what the problem is or speak to him and tell him what has happened. I am not sure what to do for the best in this situation.
Maybe it hasn’t helped that other men are reaching out to me now they know I am single but I told her I had told them I was not ready because it was too soon after DexP. She said she was confused over who I have feelings for and I just ignored it. I shouldn’t have to explain, it’s pretty obvious to me who I love.
Just don’t want to make things worse!

Your title is misleading.
Maybe your friend would simply prefer to go on holiday with her husband than you.
I cannot see any connection that she has put your ex above you.
You need to get over the break up

@poshindevon sorry I should have explained more! Since the break up she has not contacted me, she has cancelled all arrangements we have made and the holiday is the last straw. I wouldn’t care if I hadn’t spent £800 on his holiday. She of course can go where and when she likes with her husband but this has been planned for some months now. It wasn’t just a whimsical plan we are cancelling here. Something has happened to change the dynamics of the friendship and I want to know what. I am trying to move on but it’s difficult when this is hanging over my head. I want to know that he is ok and that I am not missing something that has happened.

Message her and tell her what you've written here. What was his reason for relocating? Are there children involved? I don't understand why she'd be so invested over your relationship breaking down for whatever reason. Unless it's because she feels she has to pick sides and as he is her husband's best friend, she has no choice.

Maybe she felt that you telling her about other men 'reaching out' to you was putting her in a horrible position.

He was probably asking about you and she felt she had to lie.

@cricrichan he moved due to work and he was born in Greece and now he is home doesn’t want to return. I love him so very much I want what is best for him and let him go. I wish she could see that I am hurting so badly. I feel she is taking sides and I know it’s difficult because of her husbands friendship with my ex but I have not said a bad word about him and have makntained that I love him and wish him the best. I feel she enjoyed the 4 of us all socialising together and is upset that will all end. Despite the fact he is so far away and cannot socialise with us as a 4 anyway!

@buzzlightyearsbumchin I know I regretted telling her about it. But I did state that I was not ready to move on and declined the interest in me because I still have feelings for my ex. I am not in a rush to meet someone new.

I guess I am just going to have to write her a message and tell her how much I love my ex boyfriend. How because of my love for him I wanted to let him live his life the way he wanted. That I won’t be moving on quickly because of how much I love him. Tell her that I don’t want to lose her friendship over this situation. Wish her a lovely holiday with her husband.

@cricrichan we don’t have children together but I have a daughter who loves her school and I would have to take her away from her father which also would be wrong.

Actually, the fact you have a daughter who sees her father would make it impossible to move countries! Tbh my sympathies would be with you! What does she expect you to do?

She doesn't sound like a nice friend.

@cricrichan I am actually thinking of messaging her saying that I am heartbroken over the loss of my boyfriend but also feel devastated to see a good friendship disintegrate like this over a man. I think I would feel more at peace and able to move on if I knew everything was ok with her. She is prolonging my agony and pain with her behaviour.