I dont know what to do anymore. I just feel so lost and need help. Please be kind.
Lost a parent very close to me in my late teens which has affected me badly. As a result I have a few boundary and co dependency issues. People I live with either at uni or afterwards has always been difficult as I end up being too intense and independent and it can lead then to feeling smothered.
I live with friends now. 1 girl I've known since school I feel co dependency issues toward her. I feel jealous when she talks about her getting engagement and moving in with her parter as I feel like I will loose her and be alone which I'm scared about. That can lead to me making passive aggresive comments which annoy her. I worry she will be bitching about me to others and have been compelled to check her phone. I'm not proud I just need the help and am reaching out here. It's exhausting but I'm worried about being abandoned. I was even irritated today as anotber girl asked her to let our group know when she was back safely from a night out after all being out together and later i saw she was online but hadn't let me know and felt irritated she was probably chatting to her fiancee but hadn't messaged us. I wish I could change and want to not be like this anymore as it's exhausting 
