Married 5 years, together 12, 2dc - ds1 5yo who is severely autistic and ds2 2yo.
Relationship has crumbled since dc1 was born - dh has really struggled to communicate with me, we’ve tried counselling (he refused to talk) writing feelings down (he refused to either write his or read mine) and I just feel completely abandoned by him. He claims to love the dc but will never do anything with them, certainly not on his own. No sex in over a year. He works away min- fri and just sits on his phone when he is here.
I told him 2 weeks ago I wanted to split. He just said fine but hasn’t actually done anything to get wheels moving. But now I’m scared. I’m never going to be able to find someone else am I? I’m 33, reasonably ok looking but I have to have dc’s with me all the time. Dc1 is hard work. He hates everything and everyone. If you asked him what he’d like to do more than anything in the world he say watch tv. He still sleeps in my bed. He’s incontinent. He can’t use a knife and fork. He tells me regularly that he hates me and that he’s going to kill his brother. Dh has already said when we split he’ll pay extra maintenance but he’s not having ds1 in his own. I don’t know if it would just be easier to keep life as it is.
I’m so unhappy with my life. This isn’t the way I wanted it to go.