How to come back after violence in marriage

[tearbear]

can a relationship get back to where it was after one partner has been violent? By violence I mean, grabbing my face or my arm with force in front of children, nothing worse than that but I know that is bad enough.
I'm currently making plans to move out as its just a very unhealthy relationhip regardless of the abuse but can i have an amicable relationship again with this person for the sake of my children?
partner seems to think an apology and promise is enough and we should be back to laughing and joking and playing happy families with each other already.

No there is no coming back from that. Please report it to the police so there is a record.

Why are you moving out? Is the house rented or owned? Perhaps he should be the one moving out. Contact women's aid for legal and emotional support. The police may be able to get him out.

Nope. Marriage can’t come back from violence. I was married to someone violent and it will happen again and will only get worse.

I’ve also known someone who has been violent and in his words “once I’ve done it once I will do it again because I know I can get away with it”

I've spoken to womens aid, I had another thread a few days ago and got great advice
I'm moving as partner won't and I'm worried he will get angry again, I'm afraid he will do something worse in front of the kids so I'm keeping it quiet until I've got something sorted.
He used to be the calmest person I ever met, 13 years later this is the first time hes done these things I hope he gets back to that someday.

I had an ex that tried to strangle me. He made loads of excuses at the time and when he realised I was unlikely to forgive him he apologised and promised to never do it again. Guess what? He did and more. I left that day and never went back.

Imo no. I have had two abusive marriages. The first was by far the worst and even after many promises it never ever changed. The first one showed his true colours after a year but that a story in itself. The second took a few years but he was an alcoholic and it began. I think maybe in rare cases people can change but not often.

I'm struggling to understand how after 13 years he's changed so much.
I have my part in it, I get angry at things but from being the type of person who would put a total strangers happiness before himself he's come to this?