I am 35, divorced with 2 DC. I had a couple of LTR before XH but I think that I have never dated (the modern way anyway).
From what my friends tell me, I see OLD like a job interview. There is a position to fill, two or three rounds of interviews and if you pass then you get the job (make out). Then there is "probation" (another 2-3 dates?) and if you pass you get full time job (relationship status).
Now, this is not me at all. First, I have no role to fill. I won't settle, it is ok if nobody is appropriate. Second, I don't expect butterflies, so from stranger to meaningful relationship doesn't happen to me in 5 dates.
I have had a few crushes but they mostly dissipate when I start talking to the guy 
. XH was the exception. We hit it off from day one and still, although I liked all about him I felt that I needed to know more to commit. But all my other relationships have grown from getting to know the person for some time, because we had a common hobby or went to uni together, etc. I recently learnt the term demisexual. I think I am a bit of that. I can feel sexually attracted to someone I don't know but when it comes to have a relationship that is not enough. I need to know the person quite enough.
That been said, a former colleague recently told me that he had a crush on me an wanted to be more than friends. We worked together 6 years ago (when I was married) and had not seen each other since my divorce so I have never looked at him that way. The guy is nice and has good qualities. He is great on paper (same age, never married, no kids, stable job, same industry, serious, dresses well, cooks better...). We have met 3 times: one to catch up, second when he told me he liked me, third as a date I suppose. Last time he told me he wanted to kiss me but I didn't feel it so I said no. He was ok and everything was normal after that. I told friends (I like to gossip with them since I am finding all this funny at my age) and they all tell me that you whether like someone or not and that I should let him know. Given that I wrote message to him double checking that he understood that I wanted to get to know each other as friends for now. And he said he had understood the first time and yes, he wanted to know each other better.
I am not seeing any one else, I don't think he is either although I would not mind. I don't feel the impulse to kiss him but I am not disgusted by the idea if you know what you mean. Maybe more cautious as he is a "friend" and don't want to get there without been sure of what I want.
Do you think I as much weird? That I should know if I want to be his girlfriend? Am I unfair to him? From what my friends tell me they think I am deceiving him. I have turned other guys down because I thought there was no way we could be anything. I have no reason to write this one off, I just need to know more before committing. And please let me know that not everything in these days is so fast including mating.