Hello. I know exactly how you feel, it is so hard to let go of someone you still love, but you know it's for the best in the long run, so you just have to keep plodding on, one foot in front of the other, until you get out the other side of this.
Are you still in contact with him? If so, stop that now. No texts, no talking to him or meeting up. It's an addiction and needs to be stopped cold turkey.
Remove any reminders of him from your house, pictures, gifts etc. It is like grief, and one day you will be able to look back fondly at the good times, but for now you need to clear him out of your space and reclaim it.
Take up some hobbies and find some new TV shows to watch that don't remind you of him. Tell anyone you can about how poorly he treated you. This will make it harder for you to go back to him if he comes crawling back. Don't worry about what he's telling other people. Its not true and if they believe him they don't matter.
You won't get the apology you want from him, so try to give it to yourself. Imagine him in your head saying what you need to hear him say. Forgive yourself for staying with him and allowing him to treat you badly. Maybe look into doing the freedom programme or getting some counselling to help you to make better choices next time around. And one day you will be ready to try again, even though it feels impossible at the moment. But for the time being you need to love yourself fiercely and fully so that you don't NEED him to make you feel loved.
One thing that has helped me is to imagine that in 5 years time we have both changed and grown into more mature and sorted versions of ourselves, lots of the obstacles that have caused us problems are no longer an issue and so we can start a new relationship from scratch with all the good parts and none of the bad. Would that help at all? Just to try and trick your mind into thinking this doesn't have to be the end. Of course a few months down the line when you are out of the habits that keep you together you won't want to go back to all that, but in the short term I found it a useful way to stop the panic that I would never see him again.
Mainly you just need to be gentle with yourself, a broken heart is hard enough to get over, but when you've been emotionally abused it is doubly so because your self esteem is in tatters. Sending you love 