Am I going nuts

[fence787]

Ladies

Need perspective
Have been speaking with a guy for a long time
Finally agreed to meet tomorrow
I like him
He is super keen planning dates etc
We talk a lot every day FaceTime calls texts etc
Was out yesterday with my friends and we were all drunk we facetimed whilst I was out and my friend was with me
This morning I posted a photo and tagged my friend into it
The guy has now followed her on social media
She hasn't followed him
Back definitely spoken about her to him in conversations we've had she's a good friend of mine but it's made me feel a bit uncomfortable

Would this bother you
Why would a guy who is supposedly super keen on me follow my friend straight after I post a photo
It's making me super anxious
I don't know if this is me or not

Perhaps he's followed her to see more of you? Insta? Snapchat?

Or he's a player?

But surely he's not daft he'll know she's told you.

Yeh I wouldn't be comfortable with that. Probably fancied her.

Red flag.

It’s weird - I would not be okay with this.

Maybe he wants to feel more connected to you and your social life?

Meet him and suss him out. It could be inappropriate but maybe it was a clumsy way of wanting to be a part of your life and friendship group.

OP - how about you meet him in real life and decide then if it’s weird or not.
Or - even ask him.

What’s to lose?

I wouldn’t really think he’s followed her because he fancies her. I would think it’s strange and would creep me out. Personally I only add people who I know. Having a guy that adds random people they don’t know would definitely put me off him.

If he added her to feel more connected to me I’d run a mile. He hasn’t even met her or you fgs. How weird. I’d ask him why!

I agree that wanting to feel connected to the OP’s friendship group is badly judged, if that’s the reason. I’m just saying it might not be because he fancies the friend.

I know some people that add anyone they ever come across. No harm in it, just a bit wanting to appear popular or feel connected or something

What's the problem, how the fuck is it a red flag! ?

What platform is it?
Unless it's fb, I wouldn't think it's odd.

You haven't met him yet - the rapport you currently have is based on something fairly illusory and he's looking around.

I wouldn't have given away so much too soon. Keep a bit more mystique during the early days rather than getting into all the Fb Connection stuff too early on.

Focus on getting to know the person in the RW, everything else just becomes more sweeties in the sweet shop and people become disposable and replaceable. Sad but true...

We've been married 6 years and don't follow each others friends on social media. Red flag!

I think it's very bad etiquette to do this. It would put me off, tbh.

Yes I think it's very creepy. Ask him why he did it!

It really depends what SM platform it was. OP?

Can't get over the fact that you haven't met him yet but are already drunkenly FaceTiming.

He could fancy your friend. As you two haven't met each other yet, there's every chance you won't be compatible and then he's not doing anything wrong really.

When are you meeting him?

Proper weird!

Could he have done it by mistake?
Sometimes I add random people. Just last week I started to follow a group on Facebook and only realised when I started to get weird stuff about fishing pop up on my timeline

I'm not familiar with social media etiquette but my first thought was he has misjudged getting in with your friends.

I'd give him a chance but go into it with your eyes open. If you continue to feel uncomfortable tell him or end it.

So I brought it up today and he just kinda dismissed it as if it wasn't anything he knows people she knows etc
Think I will see what tomorrow brings it has put me on edge a tad
And I'm noticing him following a few random girls today on Insta
It's not really my place to say anything I spose I can only judge him on what he says to me

OP stop stalking him online! He may think your behaviour's a red flag!

Following your friend on insta would be relatively normal in the circumstances imo if he’s in his 20s/early 30s, any older and it starts to be a little unusual. either way TBH I think your behaviour is a bit more weird. You haven’t even met him yet and you’re already hung up about the people he follows on insta! I wouldn’t like someone I’d never gone on a date with to decide it wasn’t ok for me to follow “random” “girls”. If I were him I’d be rethinking my choices.