Exh and contact

[Gingaaarghpussy]

I left my xh 10 years ago. Due to my mental health being shit, my son is in foster care. Ss obviously had to involve ds's dad as he's supposedly a resident parent.
I left because he was emotionally abusive to me and physically abusive once to our son.
My ex hasn't shown any interest until Ss has been involved.
It scares me, he has said he wants to be friends and wants to help me Any way he can.
The latest letter he has sent me was delivered by hand. I know he won't do anything because he knows if he does I will do what I need to.
How do I deal with someone who knows how the system works?
I've been told to ring the police if I feel threatened.
How can I if it looks like I'm a loon?
Help me please

Can't you get an restraining order?
I'm really confused by this post and don't want to sound thick but..
How is your ex resident parent and involved if A) your son is in foster care and B) he was violent.
Wouldn't the social keep him away?

He was classed as RP as he was looked into as a possible carer for DS rather than foster care.
Ss didn't know he was violent until they looked into his background. I even told them he was known to Ss in 2 separate areas and I spent a long time saying the same things to anyone who I could get to listen.
No one looking from the outside in would believe that he was abusive. He's now claiming to be a christian.
The problem I have, is that he only pops out of the woodwork when someone reminds him I exist, so therefore its not consistent, it just means that I spend even longer hiding in my flat note connecting with anybody until I feel safe again.
See, I sound nuts don't I?

I'd tell him that you have plenty of help at the moment. It's just a bit of time that you need so thanks for the offer but no thank you. I'd be as sweet as pie but be firm with the no. Then he can't try to wheedle into your head or try to use anything you say against you to SS or anyone else for that matter.
Try to keep calm and civil but stand firm. Don't give him any means of contact that he doesn't already have and keep a note of everything he says and does that that as soon as it starts to feel like harassment (if it goes that way) you can contact the police and SS and have the evidence ready to go. Hopefully, he will back off as soon as you show your strength.

Good luck

But won't that put me on his radar for more communication? He scares me, even now.
Even when going through court, I wouldn't speak to him and stood next to the court security, when I should have walked past him to get to where I needed to be.
I don't like the vulnerable feeling I get, when I haven't spoken to him in 10 years.