Help just need to talk

[seant]

Hiya all
Excuse my spelling and punctuation
I am feeling sick to the bottom of my soul, my wife has recently told be she doesn't love me anymore . we have a beautiful 8 year old daughter and that worship, I have stopped working away which was causing me to be in a very bad place ( missing home and family) and not been the the husband I should of been, but at the time in my mind I did it to provide for my family and didn't worry about about how it was affecting me as long as my wife and daughter were ok. how wrong could I have been !!! In my self pitying state i couldn't see how much my wife had to cope with !! The blowing point came when her mum became ill she said i wasnt there for her , which I wasnt , however she did push me away !! and dealt with it in her way which to me seemed as though she was coping ( what a DI*K I am)
anyway this was six months ago and I have a great job and am at home everynight
We have amazing times out (the 3 of us) and dont fall out .
My wife now says she thinks i am a changed man (this is due to not working away and been happy to be home ) however she cant get the feelings back she once had and cant see she ever can !!! shes ays I wasnt there for her when she needed me and cant let that go!!
I dont really no why i am writing this BTW but any chat is welcome x

Would she agree to counselling together?
Might be worth a shot.
I know when bloke says he doesn't his love his wife anymore it's often because he's had his head turned.
Does she work?

Well done on turning it around. You can't force your wife to feel any certain way. Sounds like she has already acknowledged what you have done is enough- but too little too late?

If it is as it seems, and there is no coming back from it, the positive side is that it sounds as if you have set yourself up for a very positive and civil relationship seperated (with wife and DD). I know that doesnt sound positive, but it reads as positive when you have read enough threads on here re; break ups.

Hiya Bells yes she works only with women though i really cant see that she has been unfaithful physically however cant be sure mentally if you no what i mean
she says she is frightened to go to counselling as that could be the end

I've found that some people who push others away when they need support sometimes then blame the other person for the way they feel.
I have no idea psychologically how this works but it's what has happened to me with people in my family. They seem to decide it's best to manage alone, then blame you for not being there.

"she says she is frightened to go to counselling as that could be the end"

If shes saying she doesnt love you and cant forgive you, then arent things ALREADY at the end? So what harm can counselling do?

If she's the type to push people away then she won't want to open up to a counsellor, especially if she can't open up properly to her own husband.

i dont want to call her on here but she will do the opposite to to anything she is told to do . it all started really when the little un arrived it was like a switch she didnt want to know me !! howerever i dealt with that nowing i came 2 nd or lower

Hiya Storm i agree, which maybe stupidy and grabbing onto any hope i can i think maybe she doesnt think its quite the end . then I am jolted back to reality

I just dont no what to do !!