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Relationships

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Going through a divorce. Met someone I really like but realise i'm not emotionally ready yet. AIBU to hope he'll wait for me

4 replies

SLS500 · 29/03/2018 09:14

Read lots of threads never written one so bear with me. I'm going through a divorce after a long unhappy marriage. I waited
6 months and decided I wanted to try dating, nothing serious just coffee dates etc. I then met someone and things progressed and we met several times and texted each other every day for about 3 months. Due to his job and my commitments we weren't able to see each other that often. I really fell for him, but also felt very insecure because I didn't see him much as I would have liked. I realised that I'm not strong enough to deal with this on top of everything else. We had a misunderstanding over text and I told him I wasn't ready and needed to sort myself out etc. He said I was lovely, to take my time and get things sorted. We haven't spoken since and in my heart I'm hoping that once I get myself sorted that we'll be able to rekindle things. He's also not in the best place and is changing his career because it didn't give him much free time. AIBU to hope that he'll wait and has anyone else had a relationship that didn't work because the timing was wrong?

OP posts:
fuddle · 30/03/2018 12:35

If he loves you hell wait simple.

PrizeOik · 30/03/2018 13:44

Don't hope anything. Don't worry about him. Focus on yourself and giving yourself the time you need. Don't compromise the time you need, to make him happy / try to increase the chance that he will be interested later.

Men are like buses. If one leaves there will be another along shortly. Honestly

Josuk · 30/03/2018 14:23

OP - first of - you couldn’t have ‘fallen’ for him - you barely know him - having only met a few times. You texted a lot - and that sometimes creates a false feeling of being closer with someone than you really are. Relationships are built in real time.

Secondly - it’s not quite clear from your post what exactly you are going through.

It didn’t seem like this relationship was too full on or demanding of you. Instead you just mention a ‘misunderstanding’ and needing unspecified amount of time after that.

As to this specific man - when you feel you are ready to reconnect - if he hasn’t met anyone - I am sure he’ll be happy to hear from you.
But as it’s not clear how much time you are taking - and it’s not a relationship yet - it’s unlikely he’ll be sitting at home waiting for your call.

And - as others said - he isn’t the only man around. So - don’t worry

Addy2 · 30/03/2018 17:49

If it's meant to be, it will be.

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