Fuming about guy I used to date

[Peachyfizz]

I used to date a guy at work, went wrong suddenly and he distanced himself and blocked me. He gave me no reason, wouldn't answer my question of what happened. I distanced myself and didn't engage in chat with him.

This week I asked him something and I'm over all of that now and just wanted to be friends. I went to a work meal Friday. Was polite to him but didn't pay he much attention and chatted to other people.
Later that night he had obviously had a few to drink and I was sober at home. He started texting saying why can't we be civil. I said I thought we were ok etc. We just made a joke of the past and he carried on texting me about general things. He started commenting saying how my boy looks so much more grown up in my pic. Giving me compliments etc.

I replied the next day and had confided something in him and asked him not to say anything. All I said was you haven't mentioned that what I told you to said person. Looking back now I was stupid to tell him. But I needed some evidence from him. Anyway he has now blocked me again on this messaging app.
He is now the one making things awkward! I'm so angry. Why has he blocked me I've done nothing wrong. I just wanted to move on. It's like he likes to keep me there dangling. I'm trying so hard not to tell him to never contact me again and to leave me Be. I don't know what should I Do??

Yes, good idea, keep it professional.

Let this one go. Think: poised, indifferent, dignified.

Oh, and if you're pursuing a complaint I'd keep it between yourself and management. Don't let it become staffroom gossip.

Sounds like you have a supportive employer and good opportunities here - I'd just keep my head down, distance myself from potential dramas and just focus on the work. Keep work and personal stuff separate maybe. Good luck with your studies.

I can still read it too OP.

Let it go. Be civil if you see him, but don’t contact him. You’re going to have to write off the “evidence” he has though, if he was going to send it to you he would have already. Don’t use it as a reason to stay in touch. Subpoena him for it if it gets that far.

Do you think he may have got in touch again simply to get info out of you about the complaint?

He brought it up right?

I'm struggling not to say anything to him, i know it would be satisfying telling him where to go and to leave me alone. But i know thats an immature response and it would cause more drama at work!

damson i don't think so. After the meal he just came up to me to tell me the other guy had been asking about me. Then when he first text me he said nothing about this guy until i asked if he had been out drinking with him and all he said was yea i have.

You're right, it wouldn't be worth it for a moment's satisfaction.

Much more satisfying to ignore. It removes their power by telling them that they could not matter less to you. Rise above.

All the best for the harassment case. This stuff with him must feel petty in comparison to that - you've enough on your plate without his nonsense. Good luck.

That's a good way of putting It, I certainly don't want to give him anymore control.
Thanks hopefully it goes as well as it can