Advice needed

[Mellodrama]

How would you feel if your DP of almost a year tells you he can't see us living together until his kids have moved out - they're only 10 and 7 (same as my older 2)!?!

Granted, he hasn't quite got the room for all of us, but I'm seriously wondering whether I can really wait now, at least 8 or so years before the possibility of living together?

I would think he wasn't that into me and cut my losses
Better now than years down the line

Have you met them/ been to the house or is his family life totally separate from your relationship? How on the scene is his ex? Maybe he's not quite ready to commit at that level yet

I would feel appreciative of his honesty.

If I wanted to re-marry and/or have more children, I would bid him a fond farewell and start looking for someone whose goals more closely aligned with mine.

Time to move on . . .

I would listen to what he's telling you. If he wanted to make it work, he would find a way.

I'd be massively relieved because living with someone, especially if we have to combine DC living space, sounds like the worst kind of fuckery and a recipe for a dwindling relationship

Apologises if my response sounded a bit harsh OP. However bear in mind his kids may still be at home in their 20's. He could have cold feet, he may change his mind later on. But is that something you want to bank on? You need to put yourself and your own dc's first.

For me that would be great. But it depends what you want

Personally I would think 2 things. I'm not sure why were are talking about this so early on and secondly thank fuck for that.
The whole blended family thing is hard and stressful.
I have my own place that I love living in, with all my stuff, that no one can make claim to, it stays clean when I clean it and it peaceful when I need peace. I won't be changing that.
I think he has every right to decide he doesnt want to consider bringing another woman into his children's space and start making compramises about how his home and family are run. I completely get that.
If living together etc is something you want (although why do you have to move into his place) then I would say that your relationship expectations and lifestyle preferences aren't compatible so maybe it's time to end it.