relationships

[silvercollie]

Was interested in the recent thread about a sister who does not want anything to do with her female sibling. Cannot find the thread.
My experience is with a younger favoured sister who a few years ago refused to have anything to do with me. Despite several years of trying and feeling very upset - sent flowers for a big 'O' birthday, no response, not even thank you. Problem is, I have no idea why she behaves this way. I have searched my conscience many times and while I accept that we were never close as children - she was extremely spiteful at times - she is still my sister. Am currently having counselling.

Many of us on here, and in life in general, have difficult relationships with our siblings. I currently don't have a relationship with my two evil sisters because they were VILE to me and, despite asking endless times what I'd done wrong, I never got an answer.

Like you, I trawled my 'conscience' to see what I could have done wrong. But it's just a way for them to bully me, as per. Sounds like your sister may be bullying you. You'll get some answers in therapy - it was only in therapy that I finally got the hang of what had been going on.

I used to mind about my sisters but now I'm just so so glad I don't have to see them or put up with their nastiness.

I think you have to just accept that just because they're family, doesn't mean you actually like them. Or have to like them, either. It's possible that she may have an imagined slight against you, or maybe she's a selfish soul who only stays in contact with people who are useful to her.

I am one of six- I have no contact with one of them, because he's an unpleasant person in general. The rest are varying degrees of closeness. A few years ago I would've said that I was very close to my sister, until it dawned on me that she was only friendly when she wanted something (usually money tbh). Once I stopped forking out for her, she stopped ringing/texting. Neither she nor I are unpleasant people, it's just that we don't really 'get' each other.

I gave myself permission to say to myself that if I wouldn't be friends with them if they weren't related by blood, then I didn't have to stay close to them. have much of a relationship with them. It's made life a lot easier.