Crass husband...

[fedup124567789]

My H told me last night that he fell in love with a mutual female friend's personality. That's not very respectful to me, is it?

Nope. Sorry.
Did he say what he expects to do with this information?

Or what he expects YOU to do with that information?

Depends if he's just using it as a figure of speech. But no, you're right it's not great. I say that sometimes when I see a car I love or just now on QVC website I saw an Opal necklace and I said to myself "Omg I've fallen in love" but I wouldn't say that about a bloke to my other half (if I had one...) x

He was tipsy. He and another (male) friend called her on whatsapp and I joked he (the male friend) had fallen in love with female friend. That's when my H piped up and said I fell in love with her personality.., I'm quite devastated really.

he'd be falling in love with the sofa because that's where he'd be parked... for a long time

That’s not on. Why are they even calling her on what’s app when tipsy like little school boys

Apparently he was joking and didn't think I'd take it so personally.....

what other possible way was there to 'take it' ... I don't understand why he fails to see the abhorrent disrespect of your marriage your relationship and your life together..... I'm so sorry OP

It sounds like a daft joke, like he was substituting 'personality' for something else or being rude about her.

How did she take it?

Was he rude about her? 'In love with her personality' to imply that she's ugly (so you can't be in love with her looks).

Are you generally insecure?

Are you generally insecure?

OP's husband is being a DICK and you ask if SHE'S insecure ? wow nice

You're not insecure op.

Don't gaslight the op.

OMG... there's a good chance that it was a joke about the woman and nothing to do with the OP at all...

It seems a big overreaction to me.
Only tonight DH and I were watching Stand up to Cancer Celebrity Bake-Off and DH said "I love that Stacey Solomon is always so upbeat and smiley".
Surely that is the sort of thing your DH meant?

Ooh is Stacey in your close personal circle of yours and your husbands friends then ? she's lovely

Can you give a bit more detail, OP?

Has this mutual friend had any independent contact with your H (i.e. a colleague)? Does she share a particular interest with your H?

Why was he calling her on WhatsApp?

Blimey

Not generally insecure. There's absolutely nothing going on between them apart from in my H's head, I would say.

Overreaction? I've hardly had a tantrum and was asking for some perspective. We're all different and some of you agree that it was inappropriate and some of you wouldn't have a problem hearing your significant other say that about a close friend.

Big circle of friends met the lady about 4 years ago. She's a diamond and we all love her. That's not quite the same as hearing your husband say, 'I fell in love with her personality'. He's always been a bit doey eyed around her but I just put it down to him being a silly old sod around an attractive woman. Never really bothered me but the comment , I felt, was disrespectful. Thankfully, last night we talked and he apologised and said he would have been upset had I of said that about another man.

Well, wider context is key with how these little comments are intended or perceived.

Good job you got it sorted between you.