My family are quite overbearing and its driving me mad. Because they all kind of annoy me it makes me wonder is it as much a problem with me (maybe?). I can't imagine many laid-back people enjoying spending time with my family.
I drifted apart from my sister a few years ago. We always rubbed each other up the wrong way and often clashed and I just couldn't be bothered with it. We just had different personalities - both have our faults.
We probably would have just been only a little bit distant were it not for my mum becoming massively over-involved and distraught about it. My mum is quite odd (agreed be all family members) and very prone to being over-emotional and interferring. My mum is also an alcoholic (functioning) which has led to problems between us and I have a difficult relationship with her.
My mum constantly put pressure on me to be close to my sister. She was always trying to enginner things to push us together. For example, she would invite me over and a short time later my sister would arrive. It would turn out that she had invited us both and said nothing. Then she starts looking at me in such a desperate, pleading way - as in, 'if only you'd stop being auch a horribly, cruel person and be best friends with your sister'. It was so forced and pressured I just started avoiding being around the family home. My mum's method just pushed me further away from my sister.
My mum started getting angry at me if things went well for me but not for my sister. I've had as much bad luck as good luck over the years and I've just got on with things but somehow I'm made to feel guilty for anything that goes well. I don't in the slightest gloat about anything that goes well.
My mum is angry at me if I spend time with my in-laws- especially my SIL. I prefer my in-laws as they are more laid back and don't take themselves as seriously as my own family. I never say I prefer them, obviously, but my mum would probably only be happy if I never visited them as she is very insecure and jealous.
My dad is also over-bearing. He thinks he knows everything and is right about everything and lectures at people instead of chatting to them. My brother seems to model himself on my dad and sees my dad in kind of a 'god-like' way. My brother belives my dad knows everything even though my brother is in his 30s.
When we go put for a family meal it involves by dad and brother lecturing loudly about some issue and expecting everyone to listen and agree they are right. It also involves my mum trying to engineer things so I will be close to my sister. I just find it so awkard and uncomfortable I don't even want to be there at all. With my in-laws we all just have a laugh and a chat and it is so much better.