DP and I have been together for a year . He's 43 and I'm 47 and both out of previous LTR but dated a little prior to meeting .
We've never gone a day without talking since our first date and it's been a wonderful year and we're both excited for a future together .
We've both this month out bought our ex's half of our homes and discussed living together in the next few years . Not rushing but both seem to be wanting the same thing .
At our age we both expect to come worth some history / issues and he was depressed for a while after his LTR broke down and disclosed this to me early on .
He'd just come off anti depressants when we met and we talked about it periodically . Both aware that he'd been somewhat vulnerable and he agreed that we could check in regularly about his mood so I could support him if necessary .
About 2 months ago it became apparent that he was quite low again ( it was something simple I didn't answer the phone and he completely panicked and called my daughter ).
We went away for a long weekend after that so he was able to sleep , read , eat good food and we just enjoyed each other without interruption .
Fir the first time ever he had difficulty reaching orgasm .... no other issue . We spent a lot of time in bed and it was lovely and we were able to talk about it because he'd started some other meds for something else so knew it was only temporary .
Anyway 2 weeks later same thing .
Beautiful weekend together mostly in bed but no orgasm .
If suddenly dawned on me because I'm a health professional and I just knew ..... he asked me was anything wrong so I just told him .
I said I wasn't judging him in anyway before I told him but I wanted him to know that I was really really upset that he felt he couldn't tell me and had actually told a couple of lies . I said it's absolute bollox that ####### causes difficultly achieving orgasm your on antidepressants and that's what's causing it and yes it's only temporary .
I hugged him when he nodded and I could see that he was relieved I knew and genuinely supportive but then I told him I was also worried about having to guess this . I know its only been a year but I thought we were more solid than maybe we are . I said he needs to think about why he didn't feel comfortable telling me . Said he was embarrassed which is understandable but he absolutely knows I wouldn't judge him because I suggested he have a low threshold for revisiting his GP and going on AD again as he came off them by himself possibly too soon before .
Now I'm worried he's not as into me as I thought but he was I think really upset that it had upset me so much .
I know this is about him not me but is it really bad that he didn't feel he could tell me ? He said he didn't want to worry me as I have enough to juggle but he let me worry that if was me . I love this man so much .
I don't think I push it ether . I just asked him previously if he was comfortable with me asking him how he was every few weeks and that I didn't expect him to talk to me but that I was there for him in whatever capacity he needed .
Any thoughts would be great .
Sorry fir long post and I'm probably just over thinking and should respect his wish to not tell me x