Friends?

[ChickenMom]

How do you go about making friends in your late 40’s? I’ve got kids at school but I find myself on the periphery of all the social things and for some reason never really included. Everyone’s polite and friendly but it never goes any further. Even if I organise coffee mornings etc then that’s fun but I’m still not able to build a close friendship from that and I feel quite lonely as everyone else now seems to be buddied up or in groups. I don’t seem to ever get invited unless I’m the one doing the organising! What are your tips for making friends? I feel like I’m missing a big piece of the puzzle!

I'm 45 and moved to Australia a few years ago. I had a couple of friends here but haven't really made new ones...a few women who might ask me for coffee but that's all.

I honestly think the best way is through a shared hobby. Have you thought about joining a rambling group? Or maybe an amateur dramatics club?

Agree the best way is through a shared hobby/interest - I am in my late 50s and have never found it hard to make friends but I don't go out looking for 'friends' I go out looking for things to get involved with.

We have moved a lot due to work so I am always joining new things, getting involved in volunteering etc and that's how I meet like minded people. Some become friends ........... some remain acquaintances.

There's an app (also a website if you don't do apps) called Meetup which is excellent. It'll show you groups near where you live. There's all sorts of things, just general socialising but also book clubs, music appreciation groups that kind of thing.

Thanks everyone. I think that’s the way forward. Activities. I thought I’d make friends through having the kids at school but it’s not working as I’m guessing just having the kids in the same class isn’t enough. It obviously is for some but I find small talk difficult anyway so I need something else. I’ve just joined a gym so I’m going to pursue that and find some other things to get done involved with

Well you never know if you do some gym classes you might bump into one or two of the school mums and that way you'll have some extra stuff to make small talk about.