Trouble with ex.

[Paininthesass]

He is refusing to take any responsibility for the way he treats both me and ours dcs.
He left 5 years ago to be with the ow, they split up last year and since then we started to get close again in a more friendly way rather than romantically.
Although we have slept together I was under no illusions that we were getting back together, it just wouldn't work out as there's too much water under the bridge.

However he's now started seeing another woman and is behaving in excatly the same manner he was when he was sleeping with the ow behind my back.
Ignoring my calls, turning his phone off, being rude to me constantly and blaming me for the fact we argue all the time.

We have no solid plan In place for him to see the dcs as he never sticks to anything, sometimes going weeks without seeing them and this is due to the fact that when he finds something/someone else to occupy his time, he simply drops the dcs out for them.

I really am at the end of my tether with all of it as I get no break from the daily grind and it's starting to get me down.
He won't listen to a word I say and it's not like I can force him to have the dcs, so what do I do?
I've tried calling to talk to him messaging him it just seems to be falling on death ears.

Were you married? Was there any agreement of any of this at the end of your relationship?
And don't sleep with him if it's over! You're asking for trouble! He's an ex for a reason!

You can't change the way he is unfortunately. I would advise that when he doesn't have a woman to keep him busy you avoid spending any extra time with him for sex or even with the kids. Having blurry lines will let him just take advantage of you.
Does he pay maintenance? If you go through official channels then when he doesn't show up you can document it and get a raise in maintenance atleast if that happens you could use some of that money to get a babysitter in so you do something for you and get a break.

No we wasn't married.
There has never been any agreement, because he simply won't stick to anything.
I've asked him to do eow, 1 school pick up as he finishes early one day a week.
He'll do it for a few weeks then it just drips off.

I know I shouldn't have slept with him, I was lonely and a bit drunk things happend, it hasn't and won't be happening again.

Under the guidelines from cms he is supposed to pay £200pm, however that is sporadic last month he gave me £70

First thing, contact the child support people (or whatever they are now called) and go through the official channels.
At least try to get the money you are entitled to. No, you can't force him to have the kids i'm afraid but he should be paying for them.
Why you were 'friends' with someone like this is a mystery. He sounds awful.

I will be calling the cms on Monday, i tried not to go through them so we could possibly keep things civil.

We were friends before we got together and I truly never thought things would turn out the way they did.
He has completely shocked me with his behaviour and you're right he is awful, however I've always tried to get along with him for our dcs sake, so when I say we got back on friendly terms, I meant that we could talk to each other without insulting each other.