Married Man Crush

[Toya30]

I really want to get over my work crush beacause wrll he’s married. I’m finding it really hard to move on from something thats never happened.
It all starterd just before xmas, we are work colleagues he gave me a present which reflected a private joke we share at work and I thought it was hilarious. I then notice that he often looks at me when were in the same room then looks away, and other colleagues made comments that he all ways looks me up and down when I walk by. I am very self conscious so don’t notice these things. I had a dream about him a couple of weeks ago and I can’t stop thinking about him since. We have a great friendship and I admire him for his work ethic. I don’t want to ruin our work relationship, I am totally overwhelmed by my feelings for him... but he is married and I know I can’t do anything about. I need to know how to move on... any advice please. We work together so I can’t stop seeing him and I love my Job. I’m not a home wrecker and am conflicted about how I feel... i want tonget over this pls pls any advice to help is appreciated.

@Ferrier

Nuanced Satire: look the words up in a dictionary, that’s a book with word definitions, by the way.....

It was just a humoured response.

But then you’ve probably had a humour bypass.....

Hysterically, you virtually give the same advice in the most boring diatribe, possible !!!!

Pmsl.

Well I seriously lol'ed at that post so there's a sense of humour in there somewhere

If my husband was making eyes at some woman at work I'd be mortified with embarrassment for the pair of them.
Pair of idiots. Pull yourself together op he's no catch

You have my sympathies in that physical attraction can happen anywhere especially when working in close proximity and there is no easy way of creating distance. However:

1. Please Respect marriage. That he is married, should be a turn off enough. it is troubling that in you case it isn't. Maybe you have unwittingly encouraged it yourself. All these inside jokes, presents etc. Don't feed this leviathan of lust.
2. Many in your situation are choosing darkness because they hope to maximize personal pleasure and happiness. You are a woman and if you care about people, you would think about the other woman first before you decide to selfishly silence your conscience and feed your lust for another woman's husband and yes, wreck a home in the process. 3)Deep down you know what is right and what you need to do to kill this thing off. Begin to talk to him about his wife - if you must talk to him at all. Begin to spend more time with your girl friends and mention to him you are going out with 'your boyfriend' even if you have to make it up. There are a million things you can and should do to minimize contact and break things off. 4)You deserve better than someone who is taken. Please don't settle for less. If this guy does not respect his own vows to his wife, one day he might break vows between you two. And because you are in danger of helping him silence his conscience, there will be nothing to stop him.
3. remember, we will always be attracted to this person and that person. Conduct your life with dignity and stand up for what is right, and good and proper. Too much tv these days and loose morals. Be counted among them that fight the good fight!! Far too many are giving in to temptation - much to their shame and disgrace.
4. Don't stoop low as to start justifying your bad behavior. Break it off whatever this thing is. As I said that he is married, is reason enough.