Just seen my friends DP OLD - come explain to me how the app works!!

[SilverdaleGlen]

Friend has a DP, 7 months in but love, marriage and babies in the near future. They are together whenever they can be but he works away in the week. Totally integrated into each other's lives including DC.

Anyway I was train Tindering (I travel for work) and passing his home town, he came up. I've done a sneaky text to her and he is home not away today.

So give me a reasonable explanation. If he was on there 5+ months ago and not since he met her could his profile still just be live?

If I leave his profile open (not swiping) will his information update if he moves and uses it? Thus me being able to see it's a dead profile or active (he's travelling from today all week).

Do I tell her?? He genuinely doesn't seem the cheating type and she's a catch he would be foolish to blow. Don't want to be caught in the crossfire of a dead abandoned profile! Also don't want to hurt her, she's so happy at last.

Tell your friend.

Be prepared for him convincing her that it is an old profile, or his mates were messing about with his phone

There seems so much of this lately. There is also the possibility someone is using his photos and catfishing

Or that he logged in to hide his profile/delete it...

I've told her, and was right about the most recent photo. Dammit.

What is she going to do?

Oh dear. So he's updated it since he's been with her!
Not good.
I'm still on tinder although I haven't even looked at it in weeks.
Will she set up a fake profile and try to catch him out?
That's what I'd be doing.
Or getting you to do it.
Men are fucking shits - way too often!

Good on your for telling her. This not your monkey, not your circus attitude towards people we purport to love is shit.

For the love of god don't create a fake account!

Just tell your friend what you have seen and support her in whatever she decides. Stalking a friends partner without her knowledge would be really creepy.

Not doing the fake profile thing but have agreed that I will just keep checking to see if the location changes therefore he has logged in.

The photo was early days so could be excusable I guess, she's very sensible and is going to just be "busy" for a few days to get her head straight.

I however may track him down and kick him repeatedly.

If the most recent photo is since they've been together, it's irrelevant whether it's an old profile or not - it clearly isn't, and he's clearly still "looking" in one way or another.

Your friend sounds sensible by going a bit AWOL for a bit to have a think. And you sound like a good friend for helping her figure it out.

I have come to the conclusion after chatting with several friends who use OLD that many men (and sometimes women) use these kind of sites as entertainment value and ego boosters. They often have no intention of actually meeting anyone and have a partner they care about a lot , but just cannot resist getting that little extra buzz of 'someone' validating them and finding them interesting/attractive. However there is also another kind (particularly who work away) who see it as an opportunity of getting an odd date/fun buzz etc whilst away from home.