Why do I always do this?

[EggsEggcetera]

Meet a man, have lots of sex at first (WANT lots of sex at first), then after a few weeks want less and less, until it gets to the point where all I do is push them away.

I've been with DP for 15 months now and can't stand it when he tries it on with me. I'd happily never have sex again. Sometimes he says "You were completely different at the beginning"... And he's right. But I don't know why or what to do about it :(

Oh OP you really do need help with this - a self help book or just gritting your teeth is really not going to cut it.

You've received and experienced some very damaging messages around sex and it's no surprise that you're struggling as a result.

Do you get on well with your existing counsellor? Is he or she aware of the past abuse from your ex H and others, or have you not touched on it at all?

If you are too embarrassed to speak about it out loud (very common when you've been taught since childhood that bad sexual experiences are YOUR fault and the shame is on YOU and not the abuser) would you consider writing your counsellor an email outlining the history of what you've been through, and that it's affecting your relationships and you need help? You wouldn't need to go into any details unless you wanted to. You could literally just copy and paste your post from 09:10.

Eggs It's basically when you suddenly can't stand your partner being intimate with you. It's usually called "The Ick".

It's very common!

The Ick, haha!

If you go here you can search by the type of counsellor and you have the option for online or telephone

www.counselling-directory.org.uk/adv-search.html