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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

I’m so tired...

8 replies

PetraDelphiki · 19/02/2018 23:11

I’m tired of being the one who looks after everyone else

I’m tired of being the one who provides food and wine and a shoulder/ear for everyone else’s problems

I’m tired of seeing my ‘friends’ posting their photos of them having cocktails/going to dinner/theatre together

I’m tired of inviting people here when I can’t even remember the last time someone invited us to their place

I’m tired of being the one who calls/emails first

I’m tired of people not putting themselves out even the tiniest bit for me

I’m tired of people not noticing or caring that the only thing keeping me going is my dc

I’m just tired of this

OP posts:
WonderingHard · 19/02/2018 23:43

Yep. Its easy to get tired with stuff.

I think one key is to find something that pleases you to do, often off by oneself..... something that you enjoy. It helps recharge tired and run-down batteries and reminds us of the joys of life available to us ... It can also be as simple as a decent meal at home and watching great movie.

I find I have 2-3 months of doing all the and then I make or try and make fun plans for myself or myself and others, whatever!

WonderingHard · 19/02/2018 23:44

(but I also know the feeling that you're not getting what you're giving sometimes Sad)

Walkacrossthesand · 20/02/2018 00:25

How would it be if you stopped trying? Stop offering the food and wine, the shoulder to cry on, the contact. Look after yourself and treat yourself, let the users get on with it with their cocktails and dinners.

Sounds like you've got a group of bad friends, distance yourself from them a bit - hopefully that will make space for some nicer friends to come into your life.

Howlongtilldinner · 20/02/2018 05:10

Stop doing it OP. You’ve tried and it hasn’t worked so stop now.

Look elsewhere for genuine friendships. Find an interest where there’s common ground, hopefully friendships will evolve from this.

Friends are precious, true friends. There are many ‘fair weather’, so if you find a genuine connection then hold on to it.

Bubba1234 · 20/02/2018 07:55

As others said, now is the time to stop all that.
Learning to please yourself is the hardest but most rewarding thing.
Why go to the hassle of trying to meet up with people like this when you can do a home workout or read a book or do something nice to treat yourself xxx

Trying2bgd · 20/02/2018 08:09

💐
Agree with others, time to take a break from these people and from social media and just focus on yourself! Work out what you enjoy doing and go do it.
I've turned off FB and it does make you feel better as I realised even events I attended always appeared much more fun on FB than they actually were! FB etc are not a true reflection of the lives we live.

Original poster
PetraDelphiki · 20/02/2018 09:37

Thanks everyone...I shall try to find things I enjoy doing again!

OP posts:
ICESTAR · 21/02/2018 12:30

I learned the hard way op. I now only make an effort with people who make as much effort as me. I deleted the fakers and users out of my life and looked at what people did instead of what they said. Really changes things. I now have a good set of friends. Don't see each other every week but that's how I like it but we meet up and go for food. There when I am down all sorts xxx

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