Long story short, hideous abusive relationship ended last year when it turned violent. Alter a particularly traumatic night I knew it had to end. I involved the police....welcome to 5 months of what can only be described as hell. The trial, the legal process took over my whole life.
Anyway I knew I couldn't carry on so I started intense therapy with a specialised trauma/dv unit. It's helped drastically. I've focused on work and have really tried to build my nearly shattered career prospects back up.
The court date came and went with a positive outcome and I've spent time with friends and family, finding peace again at home.
The last couple of months I've started to relax and settle but I've been so poorly. I know my immune system is shot so am now concentrating on eating better and sleeping more.
The thing is I've just got to the point where I've hit a wall. I feel really down. It's as though last year was so much about just surviving that now I'm sad. Don't get me wrong I'm glad I'm not with him, it's not that I'm sad about. I know I deserved and still do deserve better. Tbh I'm not ever looking to get involved again, and the thought of never being loved again makes me sad too. I've finished my therapy, I've put so much work into it I guess I was just expecting to be magically cured and ecstatically happy by now lol.
I've begun to look into further education which would be a long process but could mean a career change in the future as something additional to focus on but everything just seems a bit flat.
I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself because I've been poorly. I guess some motivational stories, or just some you'll get there I did would help.
I am trying so hard and have done and continue to do everything counselling has taught me I just can't wait for it all to be a distant memory. I hope I'm not putting too much pressure on myself, I do keep reminding myself that it hasn't even been a year yet so I'm doing great but then I think ffs move on already.