Out of prison and into hell

[ga2000]

I have been in prison for 4 years and while I was in open prison my partner said she wanted a baby and I said we should wait because of the situation. However, my partner came off the pill and became pregnant and advised she told me she was coming off the pill.
I have recently come home and every opportunity she gets she kicks me out of the house and blanks me for days and weeks using my son as a weapon. I knew this may happen so logged my main address at my parents so not to affect my license conditions.
I gave her £500 from money I had saved and lent her money for a deposit to move to a new house. While we have been arguing she planned on selling the pram my parent bought for £1600 and using the money to buy herself a car which in her words it to better our sons life. Furthermore, she is using the money I gave her to buy new items in the new house she in moving into which I lent her because could not afford the bills. She went on holiday in December on a skiing trip and left our baby with me for 5 days and I take him at least once a week even if were arguing or not.
I am trying to start a new business which I made her a director and she is constantly demanding money off me and calling me worthless being abusive constantly. My issue is my partner although being together wants maintenance now and is trying to back date even tho were together. My issue is I am not earning any money at the moment and keep telling her I will start supporting our son once I get some orders although she does not could me paying for haircuts or food supporting as this is not giving her money direct. However, I drive her around and take my son places and put around £40 of fuel in a week in the car but she does not count this as supporting my son. Moreover, when we need nappies or milk I always borrow the money or get money to buy these items. My family have helped us out massively and she fell out with my dad over another issue which is another story, but she constantly calls them and me even tho they homes her when she was homeless. I constantly spend around 15 hours a day working trying to work to get the company moving and earning. Do you think I an being unreasonable or should give up and get a job or go on the dole.

Could you try and get a job while working on your business?

End the relationship. It’s going nowhere and she’s treating you poorly. Get a proper maintenance agreement in place which you should then stick to. It won’t be much if you’re currently unemployed/starting a business, but you can increase it as your prospects improve. If you’re paying what you’re legally required to do, she won’t be able to say you’re not doing enough.

If you’ve been in prison for 4 years, setting up a business seems like a better idea than jsa as you’re going to struggle to get a job. Good luck!

Can I ask why you were in prison? Was it anything to do with your partner?
Leaving prison can be a difficult time for everyone involved and I think that's possibly the biggest issue here.

Has your ex also got a thread on here?same facts exactly but two very different points of view .....

Karma ^ which thread is that?

Stop giving her money under the radar - she sounds abusive

i was in prison relating to drugs and nothing to do with my partner. i am trying my best i even re educated my self with a masters degree in business managamnet.

She hates you. I think it’s fairly common to hate a partner but be unable to leave them. Do both of you a favour and end it, and work out specific maintenance and custody agreements through the courts.

Good luck with your rehabilitation

(What I would say is I know you’re frustrated but standing by a partner inprisoned is one of the most stressful and humiliating experiences I can imagine. That’s probably why she hates you)

I'm confused where are you getting the money from for the bits she asks fo. Like petrol money ? And other bits if you don't yet have an income at the moment?

I think you should stop calling her your partner. She is your ex, and the mother of your DS.
Formalise this by agreeing access arrangements, child support etc. Stop anything informal as this is being used against you.
Concentrate on your DS and your business, and making a success of your life. Show her how you are focussing on being a positive role model for him and a constant support in his life.

i only thought i should put my side of the story across on here as i got a screen shot this morning slandering me from a thread she posted on here and only felt its right to correct the story as she used the post to point out my weaknesses and score points.

technically being on job seekers or earning no money i would be paying only £7 a week which i contribute for more than that. To answer a question above i borrow money of family to pay for stuff as i have good support who help and provide until i get back up to speed and i have also being selling my designer cloths and other assets i have to get money.

I am trying the best of my abilitys to make money in a legal manner and working 15hour days. All, considering in less than 6 months i have set a web site up and uploaded 2000 products and done a deal to work with a company operating a £500k turnover. my platform is set and moving forward the next process is to take orders and then i can generatre money and hence take a wage.

I

Whatever has happened here with your partner, even the fact you are now down to rival mumsnet posts probably means you might be best off building separate lives. Put it like this, where’s the basis between you for being a couple? Nobody on here can judge the truth of what’s happened but if there’s no shared truth, that is not great. Good for you if you are working hard, focus on that and on being a decent Dad and good things will come in time.