So after a year of going back and forward and lies from my wife she finally told me she is gay. She kissed a woman nearly a year ago that she chased and started. Since then contacted her when she said she wouldn't.
A friend of hers who encouraged her to cheat on m and that my wife called her 'little devil' pushing her on, I asked her to cut ties with - she did but a few weeks ago called her even thought she knew it would cause problems. This friend is bisexual and left her husband because of it. My wife is adamant there has never been anything between them.
She told me at 9am yesterday she was gay and needed to explore her feeling s(this is the third time in a year she has said it but later taken back) and left home right away. She went to a friends house and from 1pm disappeared. She finally came home at 9pm. She told me she drove to see a female friend from work. She's known this person for 4 months. She said its just a friendship but also told this person she was gay yet friends she's had for years she wont tell. I think there is more to this with the friend but she denies it.
She refused to give me her name but eventually admitted that this friend is bisexual and in a gay relationship. She also admitted that she has been deleting conversations between them for week but says its so I didn't see them and jump to conclusions.
Other dilemma. Kids and house. Neither of us can afford to buy the other out. I really want the kids to stay in their house as they have lots of friends close by. They are 7 and 5. I know individually we will only afford a small 2 bed not close to kids friends. On the other hand I hate the thought of her getting the house and moving someone in. I worked hard for that house. She has offered to move out but i know she wants the release to go and piss about. When I was calm last night and said to her fine lets separate and try to be calm and adult about it etc etc she seemed excited. Her demeanor changed and she got jovial again, almost excited at the prospect of meeting a woman.
Just to put a bit of perspective on us. Together 15 years, hardly ever argue before this. Family would laugh at us for still holding hands and being loving after all these years. Same interests. Same goals. Both like nearly exactly the same things.
I am so angry and devastated. I genuinely believe she is asking a mistake and this is lust and about a sexual fantasy but she says she inst attracted to men, only me. Wants a relationship with a woman not men yet again all this is different from what she said before.
Is it wrong for me to report to her employer my concerns about an affair? She is in a job where she needs to be 'fit to work' as is the other person. Yet they do this!
I'm off to a lawyer this week.
Advice please