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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

how do I move on with such negative thoughts

4 replies

happyfrown · 06/02/2018 14:03

Had my friend over yesterday and we were both feeling down 'life will always be like this' state of mind both in tears.
I said I day dream of meeting someone, having a loving extended family to join (have no family myself) and having a healthy mind. Be able to do more things with the support and enjoy life. It's all in detail and colourful. It looks amazing.... in a dream.
But in reality I have bpd. I have so many issues no one will take me on. I'm miserable, my moods are ridiculous & I have scars that show I'm batshit crazy. I have a dd with me ( had 3 dcs) I don't want any more kids and I couldn't be with some one who has kids for personal reasons. There seems no chance that I will ever meet someone.
Some days I feel sod it I will just stay alone But the thought of being alone and unhappy for the foreseable future makes me feel like I'm just a waste of life.
I even said to my friend if the ex, dds dad. Asked for another try, at this moment I would say yes but I know it's the loneliness talking and me grasping out for any love?
I ended it. I felt like we weren't going no where didn't feel happy and that he deserved better and some other things.
My head just tells me this will be the same with anyone so go into defeated mind frame. Not sure what this post will gain me but hope someone could make me feel a little better then I do Sad

OP posts:
brewsandbooks · 06/02/2018 14:22

If I was you I would forget all about a partner right now, you need to love your self and know you are enough , just by being you ! If you met someone now you want expect your happiness from them and no one can do that!!

You need to love and respect every aspect of you, Your scars don't make you look crazy they make you a survivor!

I know this is all easy to say but terribly hard to do ! But you don't need any one to validate you! You are enough

happyfrown · 06/02/2018 14:31

That is true when put that way. I do feel I can't make myself happy so I guess I'm pinning my hopes on someone else. Which actually makes me sound quit horrid.

OP posts:
brewsandbooks · 06/02/2018 14:49

Your not horrid at all !!

Loving your self is so hard and I don't think ever fully achieved, I'm still trying that's for sure!

You sound like your having a tough time right now and that's ok, but please don't think you are not enough because you are !

I recommend reading happy by fearn cotton it really really helped me and opened my mind a lot !!

Lots of love

happyfrown · 06/02/2018 15:37

Thank you for being kind x

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