My obsession was an ugly git too. A weasel of a man with no backbone. He was sexually deviant too. He did things I dont care to repeat on here. But none of them made me snap out of it.
He dumped me in the summer a couple of years ago and I was still truly suffering at Christmas and into the next year despite their being no contact between us. I think I finally let go of him in the next summer so it took a year. But now I still think of him but the obsession is gone and I have accepted we will never be together and dont actually want to see him again.
Ive been in the fog of.obsession and I can see all the tricks.
When you've pissed your friends and family off too much and they wont hear of it, you turn to the net for advice. Hey presto find an old discussion where someone felt the same and start a new one.
It can be a way of indulging your desire to talk about your obsession and keep it in the forefront of your mind when no one else will listen. I know because Ive done it.
Interestingly from that thread and limerent people all you hear is, I can't, it doesnt work, or I wont.
Psychological disorders and addictions have treatments but the patient has to engage in it and they never want to because it means forgetting the LO.
In a way the obsession keeps them in your life even though they arent physically there.
I was terrified of letting go but now my only regret is ever getting involved with him in the first place.