Ended relationship with lazy DH

[SpocksEars]

I’ve ended my relationship with my lazy, selfish DH two months ago and I’m looking to hear positive stories from others who have done the same thing. I was so sick of doing EVERYTHING. He did the bare minimum and had a thousand different excuses not to do stuff. I couldn’t have our children thinking that is normal and I gave up trying to talk to him about it. But I miss him lots and I have to keep reminding myself that we deserve better and I’ve done the right thing. Are you glad you ended things with your lazy DH?

Yep same here, fraction of the work and none of the resentment now its just me and dd. So many people have said how much happier we are, life is new, exciting and full of plans!!xx

How long ago did you separate Ruddy? Does he make more of an effort now with your DD? Do you ever miss him?

We separated 9 months ago, he is renting a house and my dd stays at his 2 nights a week. She is a teenager though so if she doesn't want to stay at his that is not a problem.
I was very clear with ex that we were going to be amicable from the very start and he is, mostly, trying to be. Yes he is actually cooking for dd and having to manage his own household which proves that he was lazy and happy to leave all the boring shit to me and it was the right decision to leave to force him to step up.
Do I miss him? Honestly no. When I see him I genuinely feel nothing. I do miss the feel of an arm around me sometimes, but you know what, I have fallen in love with my new life, just me and dd, and I will not allow a man near enough to fuck it up.

You will be fine, op, 2 months is not long really. Just be kind to yourself and start doing things YOU enjoy, life really is wonderful

Two months isn’t very long, my ex was very lazy among other things. It’s strange being alone and not feeling responsible for him anymore made me realise I was co-dependant so spent a lot of time working on those issues before even entertaining another relationship. You made a decision trust the reason why.

Thanks. I’ve zero interest in other relationships. I had debated it for quite some time. I had hoped it would be amicable but he’s been very hostile. Everyone around me says I’ve done the right thing. I wish he could see how it was him who caused the breakup and change but I don’t think he ever will. I could have spent the rest of my life with him if he’d just made more effort and made me feel valued. I suppose it’s a case of coulda, woulda, shoulda. X

It’s tough, not going to lie I had a few weeks initially of euphoria, then months with a roller coaster ride of emotions. But I’ve learned to trust myself and set strong values and boundaries. Like Ruddy said be kind to yourself, treat yourself and take care of yourself. Keep a journal, set goals (no matter how small), and celebrate reaching them. Xx