Please tell me it gets easier

[girlplus]

Heartbroken is how I'm feeling

Left my abusive partner Friday but we still live together
I went to my mums for the weekend and I came back today...(he's staying out tonight but due back tomorrow) how comes when even though it's the right decision it still hurts like a dagger through the heart?
He was verbally abusive, horrible to me time after time, yet why am I feeling like I just want a cuddle and for it to all go away ?
I moved me and my little one in and forgave him time after time for losing his temper but now I'm house hunting trying to re build my life again ....it's killing me
He's accepted it so far. He's messaged me asking how I am etc and I've kept contact to a minimum to the extent where I even ignored some messages over the weekend
He's now aware I'm moving out and one minute he's nasty saying
You will be with someone else in 2 wks followed by
I love you and I just want you to be happy
He messaged me saying
Goodbye then used my full name
Told him to stop with the what's app as it's not helping me
Then messaged again 20mins later
I know once I'm gone it will be easier and it's early days but I feel like I've lost something....like I always thought things would get better

It will be hard at first but it will get better xx

Don't read the messages. He is messing with you. That's what abusive men do.

Cut contact, go no contact. It hurts because you were in a dysfunctional, codependent/manipulator relationship. You basically gave and he took and because you're so used to these roles, it's hard to relinquish them. You might be wanting to hug him and he might want this but it is only the roles. Stay firm and go nc to ween yourself off him.