"I'm in love with you but it doesn't matter because...."

[Janos]

Contd...I'm going home in the summer"

Home is another country. I've been seeing this lovely man for about 4 weeks, so not long at all really.

He's said this before but I didn't think he was serious (he's several years younger than me).

I'm kind of shell shocked. I really don't know how to react to this one. Not at all sure I feel the same way but I love spendong time with him..I have a 2 year old DS (who he hasn't met).

What on earth to do? My head is all over the place.

What CAN you do if he's leaving in a matter of weeks?

4 weeks IS a short time.. how old is he? (How old is "several years younger than you"?)

Hard to say WHAT to do.. but regarding what NOT to do.. don't let yourself feel pressured into saying you love him too.. when you are not sure you do and it's probably too soon to tell anyway.. or indeed feel pressured into making any plans to flit off around the globe to be with him (although you may not be inclined to anyway.) It would be simpler if you were childless but you are not.. so "flitting off" is not to be done lightly.. but nor indeed is a decsion on his behalf to stay instead of go.

If I was you I would be responding to his remark with something like.. "well let's just relax and enjoy the time we've got together then...". If anything changes between now and the time he is to leave, you will have a little more to base any thoughts or decisions on.

Ah thank you Shinyhappypeople

Yes, I think you're right but of course typically I always think of the right thingto say afterwards.

He's 5 yeaars younger than me (I'm 32).

Also, remember that some people use "I love you" as some kind of weapon or bargaining counter, and others only say things like that when they know they won't actually have to deliver the goods (treat you civilly even when they're furious with you, not rat out on their share of the housework, whatever).
If this chap is young, he might very well be more into the romantic idea of himself as the Doomed Lover who Has to Leave. Many people when professing love are more into the idea of how iimpossibly romantic they are being, anyway. Don't be harsh with his youthful wee spirit, but don't lose any sleep over it either.

could he be trying to force your hand?

tbh I feel suspicious that he seems to have linked the 2 things. I'd tread very carefully and be rather cynical

No offense but could he be after a green card?? Where is he from???

LOL@ your comments madamez he's 5 years younger then me.

BandofMothers I dunno - do we have green cards over here? I've no idea what his status is although believe me, it had crossed my mind. Am well past the stage of being starry eyed about men!

TBH I think he is being genuine,(from the way he behaves when he's with me)although I think when he says he's in love, he means more that he's infatuated.

I don't know. Am just going to enjoy it while it lasts. Who knows how things will turn out.

Actually, I can positively discard that greencard thing; the country he's from is in the EU so it wouldn't make any difference.