Valentine's gift advice sought

[Kinunir]

Hi everyone,

I've been dating an amazing woman for about 10 weeks now and I'm wondering what would be an appropriate level of gift to but her for Valentine's Day.

I'm thinking of going with the traditional flowers, a box of choccie and a card but wonder if that's a bit OTT this early on?

I know I could simply ask her but I do like the idea of surprising her, so, what do you think is appropriate this early on in a new relationship?

I think that would be nice. I remember DH got me 12 red tulips at this stage which were lonely and not quite as 'serious' as roses. Something like that would be great! You don't suggest that you would but absolutely no teddys!!

Lovely not lonely 🙄

She has a preference for something other than red roses so I'd be in the same boat there. Ha, no intention of buying a teddy bear

Anyone else got any thoughts or alternative ideas?

I'd personally rather have 12 mini bottles of prosecco but then I'm not into flowers and I love my fizz.

What is she interested in? Or maybe cook her a meal or take her away or organise something fun like snowboarding/horse riding and a spa?

I think flowers and make plans to do something special together on the day like a meal out or offer to come over and cook for her. I don't think you need anything more than that. I'd probably be freaked out by a card so earlier on as cards can be quite intimate and personal.

Yeah I think her favourite flowers and a nice bottle of something if she likes a drink?

I don't think flowers / chocolates / card are OTT, because it's the standard offering, isn't it? So I think you're on perfectly safe territory.

I don't mean this rudely, but for me personally it would be safe but dull territory

I don't do Valentine's at all. But if I did, I'd far rather get the flowers a week early when I wasn't expecting them "just because" - and then something more thoughtful on the day.

But you already know - no teddy bear! So I think you'll do OK 👍🏻 Glad it's going well for you!

Ellisandra I like the idea of sending the flowers early - dull is a look I definitely want to avoid so thanks for that suggestion!

Anyone else agree with mind that a card may be too intimate and personal?

Hmmm... something more personal... thinking cap required...

I don’t think a generic Valentine’s Day card could ever be reasonably considered to be too intimate or personal! I’d say the exact opposite! Spending the day together (is it a weekend this year?) doing something you both enjoy or making a meal would be much more personal. I think at 10 weeks in generic is fine though - flowers and fizz or chocolates will be more than adequate if you can’t or don’t want to cook!

Cooking is more impressive if you don't or can't cook, so you could get one of those ready made 'cook it yourself' things and do that.

I think it would be odd to do flowers etc and no card. I'd be unimpressed by early flowers, I'd think you did it to ave money. But, on the other hand, I wouldn't want to go out either as I know it costs an arm and a leg! (difficult, moi?).

You could get her a nice card with a thoughtful message in it and also a generic one with a basic “from your admirer” type message. Wait to see what she gives you and then give her the one that is most similar to that (or don’t give her either if she doesn’t give you one).
As for gifts - a nice rose scented candle instead of a bunch of roses?A lot of women love scented candles. Chocolates are always a good shout but go for something nicer than the bog standard supermarket ones If you can afford them (Hotel Chocolat have a really nice valentines range at the moment).

I'd love to do the cooking thing - I'm not great but passable, I hope - but we're not to the going into each others' houses stage yet. Alas, she is also not around on the day in question due to work commitments

Purple I was thinking of going for something personalised from Thorntons. Candles are a good shout, I know she likes them. I'm not fussed what, if anything, she gets me to be honest.

What did you do for xmas? That has surely set a tone for a gift giving level you are both comfy with at this stage?

Get her something she likes - if it's chocs and flowers great, if she would prefer welly socks for dog walking or a bottle of tequila or a ukulele or a cross stitch kit or the Donald Trump biog of shame get her that instead

I do think that at 10 weeks a card should be funny rather than romantic. That said, I was engaged by 10 weeks

I think I’d skip the card if you’re worried about what kind of card to pick, but I think flowers and chocolates are lovely. I think I’d always be happy with that at any stage of a relationship.

I’m not too bothered about Valentine’s Day, but I think I would be touched that somebody cared enough to think of me to get me a gift, should it be important to me, IYSWIM.

Actually op. What is the most attractive is for you to go with your instinct. If there were no preconceived ideas and you knew she'd love it, what would you love to get her?

One year I'd been seeing someone for about 3 months when Valentine's day arrived. My gift from him was a book - a topic I was keen on and a nice card....not overtly romantic or funny.
The books still on the shelf!

Thanks for the advice everyone. I think, based on what you've said, that I will stick with my original idea while being wary of not writing too much in the card!